


Sixty Years of Waiting

by Mellianna



Category: The Lord of the Rings - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Canon - Book, Eventual Romance, M/M, Post-Quest, The Shire, Tol Eressëa, Valinor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 18:48:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 41,663
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29494572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mellianna/pseuds/Mellianna
Summary: Based on book canon, what happens during the time that Frodo and Sam live apart for sixty years, and how does it change them, before being reunited in the Undying Lands?
Relationships: Frodo Baggins/Sam Gamgee, Rose Cotton & Sam Gamgee
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	1. 1421 Arriving home

**Author's Note:**

> I never used to ship Frodo and Sam in a romantic way, but I've recently been reading a lot of slash fiction, and I find I rather like it. I hope you don't mind my first attempt at writing some!
> 
> The characters live in my heart but of course belong to Tolkien.

S.R. 1421 Oct 6th 


“And Rose drew him in, and set him in his chair, and put little Elanor on his lap.  
He drew a deep breath. 'Well, I'm back,' he said.”

J.R.R. Tolkien. The Lord of the Rings, The Return of the King.

Sam stared blankly at nothing from his chair, he didn't seem to be aware of Rosie or Elanor at all. Rosie watched him anxiously, and nervously started to talk rapidly about the latest news, frequently checking his face for any change, but when Elanor started to yawn sleepily in his lap and Sam wasn't reacting to anything Rosie was saying, she quickly snatched Elanor up from his legs and hurried off to put their daughter down in her cot.

Soothing Elanor quietly she took a deep breath, and tried to calm her own beating heart. What on Middle Earth could be wrong? Sam seemed far more devastated than she would expect. Mr. Frodo was on his way to Rivendell, wasn't he?

Elanor settled to sleep, and Rosie realised she had to find out what was wrong, whether Sam wanted to tell her or not. She carefully closed the door on her way out and walked back into Bag End's kitchen, and her husband was sitting there, in the same position. Seemingly he hadn't moved at all. Rosie wiped her hands on her apron nervously, before moving around the room lighting the candles. She brought out the dinner and set it before him, before stiring the fire as he automatically swallowed and ate, but he still didn't say anything.

Rosie dropped to her knees in front of him when he was finished, and she slipped her hands into his. 'What's wrong, Sam?' she pleaded, looking up into his face desperately.

'Oh, Rosie!' he cracked then, his face dissolving, and the sobbing started. Wordlessly Rosie leaned forward against his trembling shoulders, running her hands around his heaving body leaning against her in desperation. Her mind was doing cartwheels as shock and surprise ran down from her head to her toes, in a cold wave. Whatever could be wrong? Was Mr. Frodo...? It didn't bear thinking about. Patiently she held Sam as he cried against her, waiting on tenderhooks.

'He's gone, Rosie!' he gasped at last.

She pulled back to look into his eyes, as another thrill of shock ran through her. 'What happened, Sam?' she cried in in concern.

Sam gasped as he tried to calm down enough to talk. It took a few moments and Sam wiped his eyes on his sleeve, taking deep breaths. He firmly looked up into her eyes. 'He's gone for ever, Rosie, he sailed away, over the sea, with the elves..,' his voice cracked.

Rosie's mind whirled, filled with confusion, 'What do you mean, Sam? Sailed away?'

Sam sighed, gripping Rosie's shoulders. 'The elves Rosie, their time in Middle Earth is over, they are all sailing away from us, over the sea to the Undying Lands.'

Rosie gasped in understanding, 'and Mr. Frodo went with them?'

'Yes,' Sam said quietly. 'And Mr. Bilbo, and Gandalf, too.'

Rosie stared her eyes wide, 'but Sam! Why? And, and how? He's not an elf how can he?...'

Sam closed his eyes in a sudden pain, 'Ring-bearers can go, Rosie.'

Rosie stared at him in shock for a full minute. Mr. Frodo had left, gone where no one was supposed to be allowed to go, and Ring-bearers can go. And then she made the connection, Sam was a Ring-bearer too. 'Sam?' she said gently rubbing his fingers between her own.

Sam sighed again, and lifted his eyes to hers again. There was a lump in her throat, she desperately didn't want to voice her concern, but at the same time there was no way she couldn't say it, 'Does that mean?'

He nodded shortly, and the fear was like a dart into her heart. 'You could... too?'

Suddenly he was desperate to reassure her as he saw the fear in her eyes. 'Only some day, love. We can live our whole lives first, in fact, Mr. Frodo...' he swallowed hard. 'He wanted me to stay, to have the life he could not.'

'Was there no other way?' she asked in dismay. 'Why Mr. Frodo? Why should he have to suffer this fate? It's so unfair!' Her distress was suddenly overwhelming, and Sam seemingly could not sit still any longer, and he jumped up and walked back and forth across the room, in an agitated pacing, before he gripped the mantelshelf for support.

'It's so unfair! He cried his tears coming, 'he's suffered so much, none of us would be living in peace without him!' He gasped as he felt the anger rising, but aware of his wife sitting in shock on the floor by his chair, he swallowed it, and taking deep breaths calmed himself down, getting angry would have to wait.

'But Sam!' Rosie said, her voice wavering, as her mind realised the more practical aspects of what she was hearing. 'What about us? Where are we going to go?' She jumped to her feet wringing her hands in fear.

Sam looked up from staring into the fire, and saw suddenly how pale she was, and he walked over to take her hands in his. 'He's left me everything, Rosie,' he said softly.

Rosie stared at him her eyes wide, 'What do you mean, Sam?'

'Bag End, all his property, money, everything. It's ours, Rosie.'

Rose stared at him her mouth hanging open, if anything she looked paler. Blindly she collasped into a chair. This was beyond comprehension, and she struggled to get her breath and take stock of what this actually meant.

Sam collasped into a chair his head in his hands, the sense of loss suddenly cold and hard in his chest, he didn't know whether to be happy that Frodo would get the healing he needed, sad at everything he'd lost along the way, or angry at the injustice of it. His own emotions he deliberately didn't look at, but he felt so tired and drained he just sat there immobile.

Rosie's shock was of a different sort: the longer Sam's lethagy went on, the more worried about him she got, it took her some time to persuade him to lie down for the night, and she frequently woke up in the night checking to see if he was still breathing, and with her there.

The next morning didn't fare much better. Sam seemed unable to concentrate on any domestic task to the point that she made him sit down in the parlour instead, because she was so worried his inattention would cause him to have an accident.

Midmorning there was a knock on the kitchen door, and she answered it to find her brothers Tom, Jolly, and Nibs there to deliver eggs and flour. Anxiously she rubbed her hands on her apron before taking the items and emotionally crashing down into a chair at the kitchen table.

'What's wrong?' Tom asked. He looked around, 'Where is Sam, and Mr. Frodo?'

'Sam's in the parlour, Tom. But I'm that worried about him!'

'Whatever's happened Rosie?' asked Jolly, sitting by her to put a comforting hand on her shoulder.

'Mr. Frodo's gone off forever and left everything to Sam!' she blurted out, unable to contain herself any longer.

Her brothers looked at each other mysified by this news. 'But what is wrong with Sam, Rosie?' asked Tom with concern.

'He just sits there, Tom! It's like he can't cope anymore, oh I don't know!' she sobbed a little into Jolly's shoulder and neck.

Tom looked quite awkward, 'perhaps I should fetch Mari, she understand's Sam's humours more than me.' Marigold who was Sam's younger sister, had married Tom Cotton the year before.

'I'm sure you mean well, Tom,' Rosie sighed. 'But his heart is broken by all this, and not even little Elanor can rouse him from it.'

'He'll come round Rosie,' said Nibs. 'He's a sensible lad, even if Mr. Frodo did take him off into foreign parts before, he didn't go this time did he? Mark my words.' He patted her shoulder affectionately.

Rosie smiled faintly through her tears, and with a promise to send Marigold round to see her, they left. After that, the news of another Mr. Baggins mysteriously disappearing, spread like wildfire throughout Hobbiton, and by the end of the day it had spread to Bywater and other outlying districts, that Mr. Frodo was gone, and that Sam Gamgee was the new owner of Bag End.

By the end of the day, Sam seemed to come out of his blank stupour, and though he couldn't seem to find any enthusiasm for any tasks, he'd never been one for being idle. Rosie hoped this was a sign that things were improving and that her fears that he was going into a decline were unfounded. That evening they ate supper together in the kitchen, only talking about the weather. It worried her that Sam had not been in the garden since he'd come back, but he still looked so tired she didn't press the matter. 'I'll wash the dishes, love,' she said. 'Why don't you get some rest?'

Sam walked aimlessly through the smial, but his restless feet, took him to the door of the master bedroom, rather than the one he shared with Rosie. For a long moment he stood there in the doorway, until unable to stop himself, he walked in and looked around.

There was still evidence of Frodo's occupation, a few clothes in the wardrobe, some dusty books on a high shelf, other small items on the night stand. Sam sat heavily on the bed, which had been made with crisp fresh sheets, and absently he stroked them with the palm of his hand.

'You knew, didn't you?' he said aloud. He reached out and picked up the pillow holding it to his chest, his misty eyes looking out of the window at the darkening sky. 'And you didn't tell me.' Tears ran down his cheeks.

'I once told you not to go where I couldn't follow,' he whispered. In the distance he could see treetops swaying in the breeze, golden-edged leaves spinning away from the branches. He hugged the pillow, 'Wait for me, Frodo me-dear. I will follow you one day.'

The next day Sam was sitting in the parlour, and was staring blankly into space, feeling numb and somehow disconnected from the world. Rose watched him for a distance not sure whether to comfort him, or to try to raise his spirits. She knew instinctively how much this trip had cost him. After all for a simple farmer's daughter having the position of housekeeper in the best hole in Hobbiton, with the best master anyone could have wished for, had been beyond what she had ever expected for herself. Now though things had changed in a very unexpected way. The revered master, was gone forever according to Sam, and had left everything to her husband in a most surprising turn of events. Living with Sam and Frodo had been a huge learning curve for her so far as it was, and she wasn't sure how much she had even taken in so far of the serious side of their journey together, but she'd gathered enough to know it was far more important than most in the Shire really knew.

Her thoughts were suddenly and rudely interrupted by a heavy banging on the green door of Bag End, which even disturbed Sam from his sombre statue-like state.

'I'll get it,' she said quickly, not wanting Sam disturbed.

'No, it's okay, Rosie,' he said, 'I need to face the music sometime.' He rose and headed for the door which was already being assailed by a second loud hammering from the other side.

Sam straightened his back, and schooled his features into one of determination, and opened the door.

Outside his home he was faced with a whole load of various hobbits, a few official ones by the door itself: a sherrif, Wil Whitfoot the Mayor who had an apologetic look on his face, and the local magistrate. Standing behind them was Lobelia Sackville-Baggins, who looked more formidable than she had of late after her time in the lockholes. Looking on from the road the commotion had attracted several local hobbits, including Sam's own father Hamfast, who was looking quite confused and shocked. The gusting wind blew autumn leaves around the feet of the waiting hobbits, and the muted colours seemed appropriate to the situation. Sam tried not to shiver, as the chill wind brushed against him.

'I'm sorry, Sam...' Wil started to say.

He was interrupted by an angry-looking Lobelia, 'Get on with it! She demanded, 'He has no rights here!' She clutched her umbrella like a weapon under her arm, her face furious. Sam looked at her with some surprise, he hadn't really expected her to argue about this after her ordeal in the lockholes, and the way she'd given Bag End back to Frodo after the Battle of Bywater.

'Sam.' Wil tried again, 'There's a rumour going around that Mr Baggins has gone off forever and left Bag End to you, you see...'

'And if it should go to anyone it should be left to family, not some servant!'

'Please, Ms Sackville-Baggins, let me...'

'Rosie,' Sam interrupted. 'Can you fetch my bag, please.'

'Yes, Sam.' Rosie hurried indoors whilst wiping her nervous hands on her apron. Sam crossed his arms in a belligerent stance, eying his unwanted guests, with a certain determination which made Wil look away in embarrassment, and Lobelia stop complaining, but presented a haughty expression of her own. The other hobbits in the lane started to whisper in excitement amongst themselves, they clearly didn't care which way events were going to unfold, just as long as they had a good view of them.

Rose was soon back out, and Sam slowly opened the bag and withdrew the parcel of papers that Frodo had given him just before leaving, and wordlessly, without opening them, handed them over to the Mayor.

Will Whitfoot glanced briefly at Sam's relaxed but blank expression, and handed off the papers to the attending magistrate, who determinedly opened the legal documents. After looking through the papers for a few minutes, the magistrate spoke quietly to Wil for a few minutes. Lobelia looked as if she was about to explode as they did this, she was clearly expecting an instant reaction. She hardly seemed able to contain her impatience, and Sam almost thought she would snatch away the documents to see them for herself. Then without another word the Magistrate handed the papers back to Wil, before withdrawing from the garden with the sherrif. The group of hobbits watching, parted as they walked through and neither looked back. The murmurs from the crowd got louder, clearly wondering what was happening.

Wil, looked at the papers and turned on his heel before addressing the whole assembled group of hobbits, 'It has been determined that these papers are duely officially stamped and marked, and have the required signatories.' He coughed, 'Therefore I declare the Residence of Bag End, and any property therein is now belonging solely to Samwise Gamgee, and any heirs he may have, and also...' Lobelia could be heard sputtering in the background, '...the tenant holes, and land, and the Hill, are the property of Samwise Gamgee, and any heirs he may have, and also the property in Crickhollow formerly belonging to Frodo Baggins and any property therein belongs to Samwise Gamgee, and any heirs he may have!'

A collective gasp rose from the crowd, and the excited murmur became a loud chatter of hobbit voices.

Will looked up at Sam and winked, before handing the documents back.

Sam breathed out, he'd not realised he'd been holding his breath. He grasped the documents tightly in his hand, the crashing reality of his former master's generosity washing over him. Wil nodded once and walked away through the crowd leaving Lobelia alone near Bag End's gate and unable it seemed, to form a sentence. She stood there for a few moments mouthing words silently, seemingly overcome with a kind of shock. Eventually she turned on her heel gripping her umbrella like a baton she left the garden, and stalked off down the road.

The assembled hobbits figuring the spectacle was over, drifted away leaving only the Gaffer who was staring at Sam with his mouth hanging open in shock.

Sam handed the papers back to Rose who looked almost as shocked as the Gaffer, and was incredibly pale. Sam gave her a quick hug and walked down to his stunned father.

Eventually Hamfast spoke, 'Did you know about this?'

'No, Dad. Not until Mr Frodo was leaving that is.'

'Mr Frodo left everything to you?' the Gaffer's voice cracked slightly.

'Yes, Dad.'

'It's not for you to be getting ideas above your station, lad!'

'I didn't ask for this, Dad.' Sam said gently, laying a hand on the Gaffers arm. Hamfast looked at him, confusion and shock in his eyes. Sam felt tears rising up, 'I wanted him to stay, I wanted...'

Then Rose was there, and he turned into her embrace, able to cry at last.

Later Sam looked around at the garden: he could pull some carrots next, and dead-head those flowers, and rake up the leaves. Yes there was much he needed to be doing.

He looked up into the greying sky, and wondered what Frodo was doing at this very moment. His own emotions couldn't be ignored anymore; he missed Frodo, missed him like crazy, and he wasn't sure that hole in his heart would ever be filled. He sighed, and set to work.

# # #

“And the ship went out into the High Sea and passed on into the West, until at last on a night of rain Frodo smelled a sweet fragrance on the air and heard the sound of singing that came over the water. And then it seemed to him that as in his dream in the house of Bombadil, the grey rain-curtain turned all to silver glass and was rolled back, and he beheld white shores and beyond them a far green country under a swift sunrise.”

J.R.R. Tolkien, The Lord of The Rings, The Return of the King.

~

It seemed to take a bit more time for the ship to approach the shore but as they did the singing got steadily louder, until it seemed to reasonate in his chest, the power of it was quite overwhelming. Eventually Frodo could see that they were making for a harbour, and the elves on board were working hard to tack the ship towards the entrance which had ornate towers on either side. As the ship rounded the harbour wall, it steered towards a large dock clearly built for large ships such as this one. The harbour itself was filled with all manner of elven boats of all different sizes, smaller boats with bright white sails manned by elves, who were all talking to each other in their high voices, larger ones heading out to sea. He could see their hands and arms pulling at rigging and fishing nets, their clear elven voices mingling in the crisp clean air of Valinor.

Frodo looked around as the light intensified, a new day dawning hot and bright. In the distance up the slope from the dock he could see a reception of elves their light shining out towards them, and he realised that they were expected. Beyond the welcoming committee there were a few buildings, and the low roofs of market stalls all along seaward side of the road. In the distance he could see nothing except the rolling green hills arching away from his sight.

He took a whole clear breath of the clear invigorating sweet air. He sighed and decided he'd better fetch Bilbo who was still sleeping below decks. He wondered if Bilbo would be less confused this morning, it was hard to explain to him what was going on at times, although he did have lucid moments. It was concerning that he asked for the Ring so very often though. Frodo left the deck, and climbed down the ladder which led down to the cabins.

He entered the small cabin which he'd shared with Bilbo on the voyage. Bilbo was still napping on his side of the room and Frodo approached him and touched his arm gently, 'Bilbo! Bilbo! We've arrived!'

Bilbo slowly opened his eyes and took a deep breath. He stared blearly around the room as if remembering where he was, 'Better shake a leg then, lad!'

Frodo grabbed the bags as Bilbo slowly made his way back up the stairwell up to the deck of the ship. When they eventually got there Gandalf was waiting for them, and he turned to help Bilbo stagger down the gangplank.

As he and Bilbo arrived on the pier he suddenly realised that he was intruding on a family reunion for there was Elrond wrapped in the arms of Celebrían, and Galadriel was also hugging them both. After a moment Celebrían turned to Galadriel with a cry of, 'Mother!'

Frodo looked away embarrassed, but Bilbo seemed to have no such qualms. He stared at the heartfelt reunion, with tears in his eyes.

Celebrían then seemed to see the hobbits standing there. 'You are all welcome.' She smiled, 'You will come back to my house for now, and we shall make merry tonight. Welcome to Tol Eressëa!'

'Thank you,' Frodo said, 'I'm afraid Bilbo can't walk very far though...'

'Do not worry Ring-bearer, I have arranged carriage for those who can not ride.'

Frodo could not help wincing slightly at the title of Ring-bearer, but she made no sign she had seen this, and swept away leading them all away from the ship. They all walked up a set of stairs leading away from the harbour and they found themselves in a kind of marketplace, with elves buying a selling and busily moving about. There didn't seem to be any real buildings in this area though despite how busy it seemed to be. On the other side was a set of carriages on a dirt road, and Frodo and Bilbo were shown to one, whilst others of their company including Gandalf, who had followed the hobbits up the stairs, mounted on horses. Bilbo seemed grateful for the conveyance and despite only having just woken up he soon fell asleep again on Frodo's shoulder.

Frodo was left then to gaze out at the green rolling hills as they moved off away from the sea. It all seemed so real now. Would he really get the healing and help he needed here? Was it all worth leaving Sam, Merry, Pippin and Rose behind? He suddenly missed Sam like a physical ache, and could almost hear his voice in his head, 'There's an eye-opener and no mistake!'

How far was it they had to go? Irrationally he wanted to stay near the sea, how could he look out for ships from where they were going? Although that seemed pointless too. Even if Sam decided to follow them, it wouldn't be soon. He sighed deeply, and looking round realised that they were starting to enter a city. It was unlike any city he'd seen before. All the buildings seemed to be made from white marble, and lined the road two stories high, Each building was surrounded by the most colourful gardens he'd ever seen, and the buildings had ivy creeping up their sides, as if they were a part of the living scene around them. This seemed just as Elvish as Rivendell, or Lorien, but again different to both.

Eventually they arrived at Celebrían's house, which turned out to be quite like a palace, dizzingly large for the hobbits. The elves were singing and soon they were feasting, and there seemed no lack of any kind of food and drink. Frodo and Bilbo were greatly honoured by the whole company, and 'Frodo of the Nine Fingers' was sung, and Bilbo was persuaded to sing a few of his own verses too. Towards the end of the evening and Frodo felt like he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer, he saw that Gandalf was leaving.

'Where are you going, Gandalf?'

'Don't worry I will be back soon, but I have an obligation to fulfill now that I have returned.' He put his hand on Frodo's shoulder, 'Elrond will look after you, but I hope to be back as quick as I can.'

Frodo felt a certain dread, 'Will I be ill again, even here Gandalf?'

'I don't doubt it, but don't be alarmed, I hope to return with help for you.'

Frodo looked away, 'Okay,' he said at last, 'I trust you will be.'

Gandalf gave Frodo's shoulder a last squeeze and swept away.

Frodo watched him go but felt almost frightened to lose his friend so soon. Then Celebrían was there and showed him and Bilbo to their rooms for the night.

His illness came on during the night, and Frodo was beset by bad dreams, the Witch King laughing in his ears, he awoke and his whole left side was cold and numb, he couldn't move his hand or arm at all. As he woke he realised he was surrounded by Elrond, Celebrían, and Bilbo, the latter was holding his left hand. Frodo gripped the white jewel he wore around his throat, it brought precious little comfort though.

'That's better,' Elrond said, leaning over him. He seemed to be applying a poltice of some sort to the wound on Frodo's shoulder. 'Come back to us, Frodo! You don't need to hold on much longer, Ólorin is coming.'

'Good to see you awake again, my boy.' Bilbo said.

'How long?' Frodo croaked.

'Only half a day,' Celebrían said, 'but we have reason to believe Gandalf is bringing help for you, try to relax.'

From then on Frodo was slipping in and out of conciousness, and the delirirum got so bad, the ring-craving so impossible to resist, he even forgot it had been destroyed and kept asking Bilbo to give it back to him. He rolled around in distress, sweat drenching his body, moaning and pleading for the Ring back. Bilbo tried to comfort Frodo as best he could, but he couldn't be there all the time, as his great age and the effects of the Ring on him were causing him to feel confusion at times too. Elrond, had some healer elves to take him to rest, and Bilbo slept for a long time, whilst Frodo still rolled around in his feverish state.

Hours passed and suddenly Gandalf burst into the room with Nienna one of the Valar at his side.

Elrond bowed low, 'We are so honoured at your presence!' He said in Quenya.

Nienna came straight over and looked at the suffering Frodo, and moments later the haze seemed to leave his eyes and he could see her more clearly, but what he saw was this being of incredible power glowing over him.

Nienna gazed at Frodo wet tears visible on her face. 'My student Ólorin has only just fetched me in time, Iorhael. Let me see your wounds, I wished for mercy for Morgoth, and for that you have suffered, my sweet child.'

Frodo felt strangely comforted by the beautiful Valar, and relaxed to her touch.

'How is he?' Gandalf asked Elrond.

'Not good, but I made him as comfortable as I could. The longing for the Ring is on him.'

'Well that wound will need time to heal, we can't do anything for that right now,' Gandalf murmured, 'but we may help his physical wounds.'

Nienna leaned over the hobbit, and carefully held her hand over the shoulder wound, without touching it. At first nothing seemed to happen, and then Frodo felt warmth returning to his shoulder. It spread down his arm and into his hand, and gradually he could start to move it again. The heat increased, and started spreading deeper and hotter until almost he didn't think he could stand it. But then it stopped all at once, and the scar on his shoulder, wrapped in a blazing white light, faded to a red line.

Frodo gasped and sat up, suddenly aware of everything around him.

Nienna smiled gently, 'And where is your other wound, Iorhael?'

Stunned by the sheer presence of her, Frodo wordlessly touched the back of his neck where Shelob's sting had hit him.

Again she held out her hand and the warmth started again, increasing like the first time: the intensity of it was unbearable and then it was gone.

'Rest now,' she said.

Frodo collasped against the pillows gratefully.

Without another word, Nienna left the sick room, Gandalf following her.

Frodo felt exhausted like he'd been running fast for some time. Celebrían came over to him, the tips of her fingers gently touching the whip mark running around his torso. 

'Orcs did this?', she asked softly. 

Frodo nodded weakly. He looked in her eyes and saw the shadow of an ancient pain. And then it was gone, and Elrond and Celebrían left. Frodo now alone fell into a deep sleep.

When Frodo awoke he looked around the room for the first time. It had a high ceiling, and ornate elvish designs, which looked far more ancient than any he'd ever seen before. The window looked out onto a garden with bright flowers, and fragrant smells were wafting in, hightening his senses. He sat up groaning from laying down for so long, his limbs were tired, and he felt quite weak. His head swam as he sat up, but was very aware of a great hunger so he dragged himself out of the large bed. It turned out he was in a room attached to an apartment of rooms within the house, which was quite self-contained: there were two bedrooms and a bathroom, which had an ornate sunken bath, but Frodo wasn't sure how to fill it. As he carried on exploring he found Bilbo in a small kitchen next to the parlour and dining area.

Bilbo hurried over to greet him with a hug. 'How are you feeling my boy?'

Much better thanks, Bilbo.' Frodo said wearily. 'You seem more awake than before too.'

'I'm feeling much improved,' Bilbo agreed, 'but I still seem to sleep a lot. When I am awake I feel younger somehow than I did before.'

'That's great!' Frodo yawned.

'Sit down my boy and I'll get you something to eat.'

Frodo looked at the furniture, 'It all seems a bit large for us.'

'They have promised to make some hobbit-sized furniture for us, so that will soon be remedied. Sit down! Sit down!'

Frodo sat on one of the large soft chairs in the parlor next to the open fire, his feet swinging, as Bilbo bustled around in the kitchen area, before bringing in tea, bread and cake. Frodo poured himself a cup gratefully.

'After this you could have a bath, Frodo,' Bilbo said. 'I can call someone to fill it for us.'

'That would be wonderful, Bilbo.' Frodo said smiling slightly.

'You're missing home aren't you?' Bilbo looked at him intently.

'Yes.' Frodo said shortly, trying to not think about what Sam might be doing at this moment.

'Well they say we're welcome to stay here in this apartment for a long as we like!'


	2. 1427 New beginnings

S.R. 1427 


Sam fingered the formal wear he had on. He still wasn't used to being so well dressed, and a major pillar of the community. Only two months had gone past since the monumental moment of his life of being elected Mayor of the Shire, and so far none of it seemed real as yet. In his heart he still felt like the plain gardener of Bag End, servant and under-class poor hobbit of a simple family. However the reality was he was a decorated war hero, friend of Meriadoc the Magificent, and Peregrin the heir to the thain-ship of the Shire, not to mention the Master of Bag End. It all seemed too much at times.

And now here he was in the heart of Tuckborough, the Great Smials, a high-ranking guest at Pippin's wedding. The Shire was in full summer, and the ceremony was being held in the hot sunshine, and the chairs set out were surrounded by huge floral arrangements. Many important guests were filling the seating, which was set out in the meadow, behind the expensive large smials of Tuckborough. Gentlehobbits from all across the Shire were in attendance, most of which were from the Took family. Sam felt like he was the only guest there who was from the lower class, and that more than anything made him feel out of place.

He looked sideways at Rose to see how she was taking this extraordinary event too, and was semi-relieved to see she looked just as nervous as he felt. In fact he thought her hands were shaking slightly. They were in the front row of the ceremony, and the proceedings of the wedding were going as you might expect. Pippin looked happy, and Diamond was blushing as all good brides do, and Merry as best man was looking extremely nervous. He did keep looking at his own wife Estella, for reassurance throughout the ordeal though.

Merry had married Estella Bolger, Fatty's sister, only a few years before, and of course Sam and Rose had attended that wedding too. On that occasion he'd felt more in the background though, not one of the gentlehobbits, no one other than the friends he knew, really paid much attention to the Gamgees. This time it was different, this time it was the wedding of the Thain's son, and Sam hadn't been Mayor then. Even before the ceremony he'd had several of them accost him on various petty matters that they wanted to bend his ear about. It was all going to take a bit of getting used to.

It was after Merry's marriage that Merry had insisted that Sam drop the formal nature of calling him 'mister', but Sam was continuing to find this difficult, in his own mind he wasn't as important, and his current status did not seem to justify this. Pippin of course had insisted too, and Sam knew it was completely against his own nature and history to comply with the request.

The marriage service was short and sweet, there were a few tears, mainly from Pippin's older sisters, and the father of the bride who was glowing with joy. He was a vast portly gentlehobbit, who liked a drink, and he preceded to walk around the attending guests talking loudly about how proud he was. Soon the party was in full swing and Sam saw his duty as Mayor to mingle with all these Tooks, Brandybucks and other gentlehobbits, who all seemed to think he was Mayor just to solve their land disputes, or to learn their family tree in intricate detail. With difficulty he excused himself from the latest of these, and found himself congratulating the bride.

'So glad you could come!' Diamond said, but there was a certain elevation of her nose as she said it. Sam was used to this though. Diamond was from a family which certainly would not have seen the Gamgee clan as anything special.

'Thanks so much for inviting us.' He replied formally. There was no way he would be impolite after all to the bride of a friend.

'Oh, well! Peregrin insisted!' Her smile didn't reach her eyes, and she moved on. Sam blinked, then shook his head, not for the first time biting his tongue to avoid making a remark he might regret.

Then Pippin, his eyes dancing with joy, came up and hugged him happily, 'Why aren't you having a dance with your lovely wife?' He asked with a wink. 

Sam looked round and evaluated his heavily pregnant wife, who had been drawn into deep conversation with Estella, 'Maybe only one this time Mr. Peregrin.' He doubted that Rose would want to dance much with the pregnancy weight.

'If you say so, my Lord Mayor!' Pippin laughed impishly.

Sam winced. 'That's not fair...'

'Well until you drop the formalities, I will continue with them as well!' Pippin said with a glint in his eye and a raised eyebrow. 'You know what to do. 

'I'm so happy, isn't she beautiful?' Pippin gazed over to where Diamond was still formally welcoming guests.

'She really is, Mr. Peregrin!' Sam said politely.

'Enjoy the dancing, Mr Mayor! Your children are being looked after with all the others, so you have no excuse. Give your lovely wife a dance!' And to emphasize the point Pippin pushed him towards Rose, and then turned to talk to another guest at the party.

Later Sam was surprised to have Paladin II call out to him, and even place a hand on his arm as if they were long-standing friends. Sam talked to the Thain about pony breeding for quite a few minutes, before excusing himself, saying that Rosie was getting quite tired. These encounters were taking some getting used to!

Rose was quite exhausted, they'd had one dance, and been required to formally greet many of the guests as per Sam's new status. So Sam settled her in their rooms in the Great Smials for the night, a great sprawling place which ornate architecture quite took his breath away, and tucked in Elanor, Frodo-lad and baby Rose. Then he headed out to the large communal sitting area to see if he could find something else to drink.

The ceiling of this room were higher than normal, and there were several large fireplaces, with soft chairs near the hearths. At one of these, Sam saw Merry who seemed to be nursing a bottle of red wine. He made his way over and sat down heavily alongside his friend.

'Here, Sam.' Merry said, pouring him a glass, 'to Pippin!' They both drank deeply, toasting the new groom, who was no doubt enjoying his wedding night at that moment. The nearby fire crackled and spat sending sparks up the chimney.

'So glad that's over?' Sam winked at Merry knowingly.

'I am so exhausted!' Merry said putting his feet up on the furniture. 'That Diamond and her mother were never satisfied. The flowers need to be moved to the back, no to the side, no to the middle! The seats are too close together, no they're too far apart... I think I rearranged everything four times over!' He threw his head back on the chair in exasperation.

'Perhaps she will settle down with time? That's what Rosie thinks...'

'If so, I hope it's soon, I'm not sure I can take much more!' He winked at Sam, your wife is much more to my liking!'

'Hands off! You have your own wife!'

Merry laughed, 'Yes I do! And she is gorgeous too!' He had another generous swig of the wine.

'How much of that have you had?' Sam raised an eyebrow.

'Nearly not enough! More?' Merry proffered the bottle, and refilled Sam's glass.

They sat in quiet contemplation for a moment. Sam watched the fire flickering and crackling in the hearth, sending shadows chasing each other across the wall.

'So,.. 'he said slowly, 'we live in a Free Land now then?'

'I thought that was awfully nice of Strider,' Merry looked up and grinned at him. 'He congratulated you on becoming Mayor didn't he?'

'He did. I had the letter a month ago I suppose...' he sighed contemplatively.

'What's wrong, Sam?'

'Well... me becoming Mayor and all. It's one of the things Mr. Frodo predicted. I really wasn't sure whether to believe him at the time, but he was right.'

'I think he could see more clearly than us, Sam. Let's drink his health too!' They drank. 'I hope he is finding the healing he needed.'

Sam nodded at this, 'I still miss him you know. I'll walk in the door and expect to see him, or I'll walk up the garden path, and hear his voice calling me.' Sam gazed down into the rich red wine in his glass. 'Sometimes it seems so real,' he said quietly.

'I know, I feel the same way too. You know sometimes I find myself talking aloud, telling him all the latest news?' Merry laughed.

Sam smiled but in a sad lopsided way.

'Mr Merry, if, if you could follow him, over the sea as it were, would you do it?'

Merry sat up and looked seriously at Sam.

'Do you want to, Sam?'

'No! Well, no, not right now...'

'Sam, when the time is right. Yes, I think you should go, will go in fact. If I could I would, but then, perhaps we will meet again eventually in what comes after. That's what the elves believe isn't it?'

'Aye.' Sam took a breath. 'I miss him, so much, but I have a life to think on now...'

'Exactly! You don't need to make any kind of decision yet.'

Merry moved over and gripped Sam's shoulder. They sat together for a long moment. Eventually Sam took a long drag of his wine. 'You know, I don't think Diamond of Long Cleeve likes me?'

Merry laughed then.

# # #

Frodo crashed through the door of the apartment he shared with Bilbo.

'I've found the perfect place, Bilbo!' he claimed with excitement.

Bilbo looked up at the breathless hobbit, from cooking their evening meal in their small kitchen, 'Found what, Frodo?'

'A place to build our home! I was walking down by the sea and it's perfect, rolling green hills, near the beach only a few hours' walk from the harbour market, we could build the perfect hobbit-hole there.'

'It sounds marvellous,' Bilbo said. 'Will the elves let us build a hole there do you think?'

'I already asked and, yes they will. Will you come and see the place?'

'Yes of course we can walk down there tomorrow. Gandalf is back you know, perhaps he will come along as well.'

Frodo looked at his adopted uncle. In the weeks and months after arriving on Tol Eressëa, he'd slept a great deal, but now he seemed as full of energy as a fifty year old hobbit. He even looked a bit younger. The sleepiness had gone, and the confusion he'd been suffering from before leaving Middle Earth had disappeared as well. He even claimed that the ring-craving had dulled somewhat since their arrival. Frodo was a bit jealous of that, as much as he no longer suffered his annual illnesses, the ring-craving was still present and at times it was hard to think about anything else. Only thinking about Sam seemed to help, but then that way of thinking wasn't too helpful either, as those thoughts only led to a different kind of brooding. He was secretly hoping this project would distract from both of those things and turn his thoughts into a more profitable direction.

Both of them had adjusted to living in the apartment joined on to the house of Celebrían and Elrond, and they were welcomed by the elves from Middle Earth and Tol Eressëa equally. They had no shortage of time relaxing in the halls of the palace, or being in their own space, but both of them, did feel like they needed a more hobbit-like space in which to spend their time, even Bilbo who was of course used to living with elves by this time, felt this need now that he was with Frodo most of the time. Bilbo indeed was happy to spend much of his time with Elrond's company, but he saw the benefits of having a more hobbit-like existence with Frodo too. In a way he missed Bag End, especially now that his mental faculties had come back. In Rivendell he'd been so tired much of the time, it hadn't really bothered him, but the weight of age and the strain the Ring had imposed on him were not the factors they once were. He was however not very interested in building a potential smial himself, but was more than happy for Frodo to have the project he needed. For Frodo, having a hobbit home meant just a little bit more, he couldn't help but plan for a possible future when Sam might join them at some point, and if that should happen, he wanted Sam to feel as comfortable as possible.

Next day they were at the site found by Frodo. Bilbo, Gandalf and some attendant elves whose job it would be to help build the new smial were all gathered at the site. 'The garden would go here, and the well would fit about there.' Frodo was saying. Gesturing widely with his arms, his maimed hand pointing at the spots indicated.

'That would work,' mused Gandalf thoughtfully leaning on his staff, as if he really were the old man he seemed to be.

'As for the hole itself it doesn't need to be too large, but have guest quarters, and some areas with higher ceilings for our friends...'

'You've really thought this through I can see.'

'I need somewhere which feels like home, Gandalf.'

'And then you'll let me turn your mind to healing yourself?' Gandalf smiled kindly but looked intently at Frodo, in an effort to persuade him.

Frodo looked away.

'I understand not wanting to face it all at once, my dear boy, but you will have to let me talk to you about it eventually.'

'I know, I just can't face it right now.'

'Please, Frodo.' Bilbo said, 'the sessions I've had, have been very helpful. I hardly feel the presence of the Ring anymore...'

'It's different for me Bilbo.' Frodo said dismissively, 'The trauma I went through...'

'My dear boy...'

'Please, Bilbo! Just, just tell me what things you'd like to do with our new home. That's what's going to help me now.' Frodo said shutting down the conversation. Gandalf and Bilbo exchanged a worried but resigned look. They knew how stubborn Frodo could be on this issue. Gandalf shrugged imperceptibly, as if to say, give it time. 

Bilbo acknowledged this with a slight nod, and was happy to change the subject. He turned and contemplated the rolling green hill in front of the them, the short distance to the white sand dunes and the crashing of the waves. 'It seems a perfect site to me, I think the kitchen should go here...'

As Bilbo went through the plans, Frodo distractedly turned and looked out to sea. The harbour being only two hours' walk away meant there were loads of small boats and ships visible on the water, suddenly he saw a larger vessel far off and steering into land. His heartbeat picked up as he saw it, and realised what it was. 'Gandalf! A ship is coming in!'

'Gandalf turned and looked where Frodo was pointing excitedly. 'Yes,' he said, 'there are many leaving Middle Earth right now, we'll see a number of ships for a little while.'

'But Gandalf...'

'It's too soon for Sam,' Gandalf said gently.

Frodo's head dropped slightly, 'Do you think he will come?'

Gandalf gazed at the approaching ship, 'You know, Frodo? I really think he will. And perhaps sooner than you expect. Well lets make some plans, shall we? You'll need a nice home to bring him to when he comes.' his eyes were bright, but also had a depth of perception in them, which Frodo didn't want to think about.

'If he comes, Gandalf, if.' Frodo turned away from the sea, and consulted the plans once more.


	3. 1432 A trying day

S.R. 1432 


The weather was brightly sunny, it being a summer's day in Buckland. A soft haze was rising from the Brandywine river, and ducks quacked along the shoreline. The normal happy chatter of hobbits which filled the air on a normal summer's day were silent however, and the wind in the trees and the birdsong, seemed somehow louder than normal. Merry felt the weight of the air, and almost it seemed to be weighing down his head, and the moisture streaming down his face, was not necessarily his own tears, but a certain proportion of it was. He reflexively gripped Estella's hand in his own, and he prepared to leave Brandy Hall, forcing his head up in the bright sunshine, which felt like a lead weight beating on his brow.

Estella reached out to their son Gorbadoc and daughter Rosa, whose sombre expressions seemed incongruent with their young age, their normally active little bodies still and slow as the procession followed the pall bearers to the Brandybuck cemetery which was on the hedge side of Brandy Hall.

Pippin wasn't far behind with his now aged father Paladin, and his wife Diamond. His son Faramir was in his arms, the boy looked quite sleepy.

The new Master of Buckland stood and watched as his father Saradoc was committed to the ground. He stood and watched long after many of the others present had drifted away. Paladin had spoken a few words with his hand on his shoulder, but Merry had hardly looked up. With a last glance Estella led the children away, and the only guests left were Sam and Pippin who also stood a silent vigil by his side.

Eventually Pippin spoke. 'It was a good service.'

'Pip, really?' Merry groaned.

'I know, ' Pippin said placing a comforting hand on his arm, 'it's what you're supposed to say isn't it?'

Merry sighed.

'It will get easier, Merry,' Sam said. 'I lost me Gaffer five year or so ago... Although seemingly the pain stays sharp enough.'

'Thanks, Sam.' Merry said quietly still staring at the newly cut grave.

Sam raised his head and for the first time looked around. The cemetery was fairly large, and very well-maintained, the headstones were clean and sharp, the names clearly visible. Sam felt stiflingly hot, flies buzzing around his head, as he cast his eyes around without really seeing any detail. Suddenly a nearby grave caught his eye, and he looked back at the spot. The grave, unlike most of the others, was not well-maintained: moss was growing on the headstone, weeds covered the top, and ancient flowers placed there were nearly rotted away. It was in such stark contrast to the rest, that Sam was moving before he really meant to. Leaving Merry and Pippin behind him, he strode over to the grave and crouched down, tracing his fingers over the lettering there on the headstone.

The names jumped out at him and his heart beat a little faster. 

Primula Brandybuck and Drogo Baggins.

He heard a movement behind him and looked up to see that Merry and Pippin had come over to see what he was looking at.

'I didn't realise it had been so neglected,' Merry said. 'Don't worry, Sam. I'll make sure someone sees to it from now on.'

'I should think so!' Pippin said. 'Poor Frodo, losing his parents so young. I wish he could have been here for this though, he was close to Saradoc from his time at Brandy Hall, wasn't he Merry?'

Merry nodded, still grief-stricken, his eyes red. 'Well we'd better head back, then,' he sighed.

The wake was in a large hall in Brandy Hall, and it was packed with hobbits which on a day like this made it impossibly hot. Still nobody complained as the food and drink was generous and hobbits could forgive anything with enough sustenance to get them through.

Sam was quite used to his role as Mayor now that five years had passed, the endless stream of hobbits wanting his attention didn't faze him in the slightest, and diligently he noted down the things they were saying, but not giving any promises of resolution to whatever their problem might be.

'You're getting good at this business,' Paladin said with a wink, and Sam was suddenly struck just how like Pippin the Thain really was. 'This leading business can be a bit much at times, can't it?

'Yes indeed, sir,' Sam agreed.

'I hope you'll help me keep an eye on the new Master of Buckland though, my lad. He'll need your support in the coming weeks and months.'

'Of course,' Sam looked over at the still-grieving Merry. 'He has a friend in me, but I fancy he'll do all right.'

'Of course he will, of course.' Paladin agreed, and the old hobbit moved off slowly to talk to Esmeralda his sister and grieving widow, who was quite frail, and was sitting in the corner with Pearl and Pervinca Took.

The heat was all getting too much for Rose and the children after a few hours though, so Sam made his way over to say his farewells for the night. Diamond brightly kissed his cheek, she had mellowed a bit since her wedding to Pippin, and the fact that Sam was Mayor of the Shire had elevated him in her eyes somewhat in the years that she had known him. She seemed to have forgotten that her esteem wasn't that elevated at the start of his term though. It also helped that he was on friendly terms with her husband and children. The families frequently visited each other, and it would be hard to look down on the owner of the best hole in the whole of Hobbiton!

'I'll see you tomorrow for the feast, Sam!' Merry said hugging him.

'Wouldn't miss it!' Sam assured him, and turned to hug Pippin. 'Goodbye, Pippin!'

'Bye, Sam!' Pippin cried.

Sam and Rose walked with their family the short distance to their house in Crickhollow. Bluebell their nanny and maid carried young Goldilocks, and Rose held two month old Hamfast, Sam's Gaffer's namesake, in a sling about her neck. Elanor held the hands of Merry and Pippin, and Frodo was running by his father's heels in order to hear everything he might be saying, whilst Rosie-lass skipped happily in front of the party. Sam had never felt so blessed with his dear family.

Supper and bedtime for the children went like clockwork, and soon Hamfast was asleep in the cot in the master bedroom, Elanor, Rosie-lass and Goldilocks in one room, and Frodo-lad, Merry and Pippin in another. Bluebell looked quite exhausted too, and headed for her own room.

'If we have any more little'uns we'll need to enlarge this hole!' Sam said tiredly.

'No,' Rose disagreed, 'there are plenty of rooms here, we'll convert the bathroom, and scullery and it'll be fine!' She smiled at him. She never seemed to tire of having so many children. Although it had become necessary to hire some help in the person of Bluebell, as with so many children, Sam and Rose had needed the extra help with chores. It had gone against the grain at first, especially with Rose, but with Sam being away on a frequent basis for Mayoral duties, it soon became totally necessary, and now if asked, Rose would only say that she regarded Bluebell as one of the family. Sam secretly thought they may need to hire more help at some point, but they'd cross that bridge when it came to it. How had he ended up a landed country gentleman with his own servants? That had been something he'd never expected!

'So are you looking forward to the celebration feast tomorrow night?' Rose asked.

'Yes of course, love. It'll be a great occasion for Merry.' Sam looked a little sombre, 'Would you take the children to Brandy Hall in the morning? There's something I need to take care of.'

The next morning, Merry came out of Brandy Hall at noon, having been sent by the wives to find Sam. He had a feeling he knew where he would be.

Sure enough there he was kneeling by the grave, the moss was cleared away, the weeds removed, flowers now covered the grave, and it looked as well-maintained as any other one there.

'It looks lovely, Sam,' Merry said.

Sam stood up. 'If you don't mind, I'd like to check on it from time to time, when I'm in the area, like.'

'Of course Sam.' They stood there together for a few moments. 'Well, you coming to my celebration then?'

Sam slowly nodded, and with one last look, turned away, and followed Merry back to the Hall.

# # #

Frodo was sweating hard. The seasons didn't really change much in Tol Eressëa, mostly it was hot and sunny until storms would roll in off the sea at night and rain hard over the green land, and then there was a rainy season when you'd get soaked if you dared out of doors during that time. It served very well to keep the hot land from drying up, but was inconvenient for hard physical labour.

Frodo was beginning to feel more adapted to this unusual climate, but right at this moment when he was covered in stone dust was not the best time to be out in the impossible heat of the day. The elves who were with him were discussing the next part of the construction of the new smial. They were sitting in the shade talking among themselves in rapid Sindarin, and he was tired of trying to keep track of such technical language. There was only one thing for it, Frodo ran down the beach over the hot sand, and stripped off to fling himself into the water. The sea was unusually calm and and he swam out of his depth diving down sighing with relief, easing his sore muscles.

He'd gotten used to living in this place, but he had no real sense of time, and wondered idly how long he'd actually been there. He floated on his back gazing up at the bright sun, and let the tension ease out of his tired limbs. He'd never known how hard it was to actually have a building project, he'd never even spoken to another hobbit about the process before. He had vague memories of the process on building the New Row in Hobbiton, but at the time he'd been so sick, he'd not taken a great deal of notice. Now he wished he'd paid more attention.

Still the project was going well, albeit slowly. The fact he was living out here rather than in Avallónë, was helping things along a great deal, but he missed the sunken bath of the apartment he shared with Bilbo. He also missed Bilbo who spent most of his time reading or reciting poetry with his elven friends. Frodo needed this project, but he felt incredibly lonely yet again. A common theme of his life so far, he thought with regret. Despite feeling much stronger in body, his spirit was still depressed and it alarmed him how often he still had nightmares, or found himself thinking about the Ring. Would that ever leave him? Gandalf had assured him that it would, so maybe he was too impatient. In the lonely moments in his tent at night, he would wake and miss Sam more than he'd ever thought it possible to miss anyone.

He'd gained the habit of walking down to the harbour every time he saw a ship sailing in from Middle Earth. He couldn't really stop himself. The fact was though, fewer ships were coming and larger amounts of time stretched between each one, every time hope seem to dim just a little more. He wasn't even sure why he even expected Sam to make the journey, after all he had everything he ever wanted didn't he? A wife, a family, a good home, friends. Even in old age he would be tied to the Shire and Frodo would be left wondering how his life even turned out, so best to forget about it, and put it aside. Bilbo seemed to worry about Frodo's obsession with the ships, he was afraid of the effect it would have if Frodo was constantly disappointed.

Frodo headed back for the shore, he needed something to eat. The sun on the white sand was quite blinding for a moment and he shaded his eyes to find his clothes.

For a moment he turned back to the sea, listening to the crashing of the waves spilling up over the sand shore, rolling eddies foaming and dying. 'I miss you, Sam.' Frodo said quietly to the sea.

Wet and dressed again he headed back to his friends and sat with them discussing the next stage of the work.


	4. 1434 Working hard

S.R. 1434 


Sam's mayoral offices in Michel Delving were formal but well appointed, the conference room was small but had a wide oak table and the room itself had decorated panelled walls and fine portraits of previous mayors covering the walls. The fire was lit as autumn was starting to bite and it was a fairly cold day. Sam had been re-elected for office ony a few months before, and his formal attire now seemed quite normal and even comfortable to him as he sat at his ease smoking his pipe with his companions.

Pippin had lost his father at the beginning of the year, and had taken it hard for several months, now though, he'd seemed to have matured into his new role of Thain of the Shire, Peregrin I. He was taking well to the responsibilities of the post so far, and looked at the papers before him with a serious expression.

The Master of Buckland merely leaned back in his chair blowing smoke rings at the ceiling.

'Well,' Pippin was saying, 'these are the papers the King sent to me, if we can all sign them, and then everything will be official!'

'And we will be Counsellors of the North?' asked Sam.

'Well we already are, technically. This is just the legal part of it.'

'What exactly are our responsibilities then?'

'Well our role is to the be King Elessar's commanders of this part of Middle Earth, we answer to him.'

'I thought we answered to him anyway, Pip,' Merry blew another ring of smoke.

'Well, now any commands he gives we have to carry out. I wish you'd take this more seriously, Merry!'

'Of course I'm taking it seriously, I'm here aren't I?'

Pippin sighed, 'It would help if you were looking at me when you said that.'

'What else did the King say, Pippin?' asked Sam.

'Only that his house by Lake Evendim is nearly finished, and it won't be long before he comes to visit the Shire.'

'Will he enter the Shire then?'

'No he won't break his own rules by entering, but no doubt we will visit him there.'

'I'd like to see old Strider again.' Sam said wistfully.

'Me too! I wonder if Éomer will come as well?' pondered Merry, still puffing on his pipe.

'You visited him last year didn't you, Merry?' Pippin enquired, knowing the answer.

'It's my duty to visit from time to time,' Merry sat up. 'Just as it is yours to visit Gondor!'

'Well, yes. But now we have obligations here as well.' Pippin looked at Sam, 'you've not been back yet. Planning on going?'

Sam looked uncomfortable, 'I've got too much to occupy me here right now, Pippin.'

'That shouldn't stop you, we'd cover for you until you got back.'

'Well maybe some day...' Sam looked at the other two, 'so are we signing this paperwork or not?'

# # #

Frodo was outside the smial in the cool air of early morning but he still had to wipe the sweat out of his eyes. Planning a garden was one thing but actually creating it was very hard work!

Bilbo wandered out of the front door, round and green like Bag End, but somewhat larger to accommodate their elven friends. 'Hey, I've made you a cup of tea!'

'Thanks Bilbo!' Frodo stood up and accepted the cup gratefully.

'You're making good progress,' Bilbo said admiringly. 'I never realised how good a gardener you were!'

Frodo laughed ruefully, 'Me neither, Bilbo!' He took a sip of tea, 'there's still so much to do!'

'You'll get there in the end.' Bilbo patted Frodo on the shoulder, 'you've worked so hard on this house for us.'

Later that day, Frodo put down his tools and came into his home. It was quite like a normal hobbit hole despite the high ceilings, but one concession to elvish living was a large sunken bath in the bathroom, which had hot water piped from the fire in the kitchen. Frodo bathed and dried himself, and after getting dressed again entered the dining area next to the kitchen where Bilbo was serving dinner, 'Thanks, Bilbo.'

'You deserve it my boy, eat up!' Bilbo smiled.

They sat reading that evening and Frodo stayed up late after Bilbo had gone to his own room. Frodo had a tendency to put off sleep as long as possible. He sighed and yawned and headed for his room and his over-large bed.

_It was dark in Mordor, and the Ring was on Frodo's finger. red streaks like lightening crashed across the sky. 'Kill him!' the command came, Frodo looked down at Sam sobbing at his feet,... he raised his hand..._

Frodo woke with a jerk, his wet sheets were tangled around his body, and he was panting with fear and shame. It was just a dream! I didn't really kill him, I didn't! Frodo laid back down staring at the ceiling lying in his lonely bed, feeling as if he'd never feel happy again.


	5. 1436 Friends Reunited

S.R. 1436 


“'March the twenty-fifth!' he said. 'This day seventeen years ago, Rose wife, I didn't think I'd ever see thee again. But I kept on hoping.'  
'I never hoped at all, Sam,' she said, 'not until that very day; and then suddenly I did. About noon it was, and I felt so glad that I began singing. And mother said: “Quiet, lass! There's ruffians about.” And I said: “Let them come! Their time will soon be over. Sam's coming back.” And you came.'  
'I did,' said Sam. 'To the most belovedest place in all the world. To my Rose and my garden.'  
They went in, and Sam shut the door. But even as he did so he heard suddenly, deep and unstilled, the sigh and murmur of the Sea upon the shore of Middle-Earth.'

J.R.R. Tolkien, Unpublished Epilogue to ROTK, Sauron Defeated.

Sam and his family set out from their home in Crickhollow, riding northwards next to the Brandywine towards the Brandywine Bridge. With him there were many Shire hobbits from all across the Shire representing villages far and wide, and also The Thain, and the Master and their families rode along too. It was the 2nd of April only a week since Sam had first heard the call of the sea, but that was far from his mind at the present moment, because he was on his way to meet King Elessar and Queen Arwen for the first time in seventeen years.

The assembled hobbits gathered on the Eastern side of the Brandywine Bridge, the Thain, Master, and the Mayor standing at the front. Tents had been set up by the side of the road by part of the King's company which had arrived earlier on. Many of the hobbits looked nervously at the men walking around setting up the pavilions.

They didn't have to wait long, King Elessar, was riding towards them flanked by his company, Queen Arwen and Prince Eldarion. The King dismounted and his three friends all bowed to the King, the rest of the company of hobbits then followed suit behind them.

Aragorn then addressed those assembled there, 'My dear friends, and hobbits of the Shire, thank you for welcoming your King to your land. I will not enter the Shire in order to honour the decree I made, making your land a Free Land, where men are not allowed to enter. Therefore I leave my governance of your land in the hands of my Counsellors of the North: Thain Peregrin the first, Knight of Gondor; Meriadoc the Magnificent, Knight of Rohan; and Mayor Samwise Gamgee, Ringbearer. I come north now, to fully take possession of all my lands here in Eridor, showing you all, that Gondor is not so remote, that my hand does reach to these lands as well.

'I take this opportunity to honour my dear friends of these lands, your Thain's defeat of a troll, the Master of Buckland's attack on the King of the Nazgul, and last but not least, the amazing strength and endurance of Samwise Gamgee in Mordor, to destroy the One Ring and free all of our lands.'

Sam went a bit pink but didn't look away.

'My speech would not be complete without mentioning those who cannot be here,' he scanned the restless hobbits in front of him, 'we all lost dear friends and neighbours in the War of the Ring, your very land was attacked, but most of all, our dear Frodo Baggins, who was the instrument of all our good fortunes, by destroying the One Ring. It injured him so much that he was materially damaged by the journey.' He eyed the crowd who were starting to whisper amongst themselves. 'His sacrifice is the greatest tragedy, and we can only hope he has found the healing he needs in Valinor!'

Silence followed his words, but Sam could sense the unease behind him, it turned his stomach that his people still didn't value Frodo they way should.

But Aragorn wasn't finished, he shouted, 'Praise him with great Praise!'

The three friends and their families joined in with this with great gusto, forcing the dubious ones behind to join in. Aragorn nodded, 'now let us feast!'

This at least set up an appreciative cheer from the gathered hobbits. They dispersed towards the tents, Sam, Merry and Pippin's children went with their attendants to eat as well, so the Counsellors formally followed Aragorn and Arwen into a more private tent with their wives in tow.

Once inside Aragorn took off his crown and formal cloak, and turned and grinned at the hobbits. Rose was nervous and was keeping close to Sam during this encounter, she'd never had to meet a King before. She was breathing fast with worry despite Sam's assurances, and therefore not prepared for her husband's reaction. As soon as they were in that private place, Sam cried with joy, 'Strider!' and threw himself into the arms of the King.

Merry and Pippin also shouted and threw themselves at the King, and to Rose's further surprise the King responded with a huge hug around the three of them, and there were tears in his eyes. 'My dear friends! It's so good to see you again!'

'That was a great speech, Strider,' Sam said.

'Yes it wasn't too long!' laughed Pippin.

'You never change, Pippin!' cried the King ruffling his hair with one hand.

'Did you really expect him to?' laughed Merry, 'Oh dear Strider, it is so good to see you.' Merry turned and looked at the nervous wives behind them, 'may I introduce our good ladies?'

'Please do,' Aragorn smiled at the nervous lady hobbits.

'My wife, Estella.' Estella bowed nervously, and Rose realised it wasn't just her who was feeling a bit overawed.

Aragorn smiled and nodded at her, 'this is Diamond, Pippin's love.' Merry continued. Even Diamond looked a little overwhelmed, 'and this is Rosie, Sam's lady.'

Rose swallowed with nerves as she came forward to take Sam's outstretched hand. Despite his reassuring smile, her curtsey was a little shaky.

'It's very good to meet all of you at long last,' Aragorn smiled, 'I'd like you all to meet my wife, Arwen, and I hope you will all be good friends.'

Rose curtsied again, but Arwen was quick to say to the ladies that they need not do that in private, then they all left to get to know each other better, leaving Aragorn and the male hobbits to sit and drink together and reminisce about old times.

Eventually they all left and joined the main company in a large marque tent, and sat with their wives and the King and Queen at the top table. At the end of the feast Sam stood up and addressed the hobbits loudly, and slowly they paid attention to him. Sam had learnt over time how to get their attention. 'My dear hobbits!' he exclaimed loudly, 'please be upstanding for King Elessar!' There was a murmuring of voices, but the collection of Shire hobbits slowly gained their feet. King Elessar stood up and first of all he loudly toasted Frodo, which the assembled hobbits, now full of food and drink, were happy to go along with, but then to the surprise of most, the King called upon a minstel, who took up the lay of Frodo of the Nine Fingers and the Ring of Doom, and even the most skeptical of old gaffers shed a few tears at the end of it, and cheers went up. 

'I now ask Mayor Samwise Gamgee to stand', he cried, and suddenly pink Sam rose. 'I present him a very great honour: the Star of the Dúnedain may it be an heirloom to his house for all his deeds for all of us', and he pinned it to Sam's chest for all to see. Sam was too embarrassed to say anything. Then the King declared a toast, and Sam sat down crimson to his ears.

Elanor and Frodo Gamgee entered the tent after this, having left the children's tent, and shyly approached the King and Queen. Elanor curtsied deeply and presented the Queen with a fine posy of flowers, tied together with ribbon she'd made. 'These are for you, my Queen,' the fifteen year old hobbit lass said softly.

'I helped grow them, your Majesty,' Frodo added, blushing redly. He was like Sam in miniature and there was no doubting who they were.

'My dear children,' Queen Arwen said accepting the gift.

'My Queen,' said Elanor, 'I would wait on you if I may?' she looked up shyly.

'My dear child,' Arwen said with a glance at Sam and Rose, 'you shall be my maid of honour.' She smiled then, 'but your tasks shan't be too taxing I think, but I will require my maid of honour to visit me in Gondor in the future.'

Elanor looked flushed with delight at these words, and turned shining eyes on to her Sam-Dad, who himself looked very proud indeed.

'Come,' Arwen said to the children, 'and let me get to know you a little.' They set off to introduce their siblings, with Sam and Rosie following along behind.

'That went well, Sam,' Rosie said in his ear.

He smiled, 'I told you it would,' he said kissing her cheek. 'These grand people are my friends after all.'

'It's just hard to accept,' she laughed.

The next day the Counsellors and their families joined the King's procession north following the Brandywine to Evendim Lake, and eventually to the palace residence there set up for the King.

Here they could be much more informal with one another, and the old friends got to be just that for most of the time, unless some local dignitary was visiting for an audience.

Frodo Gamgee spent a lot of time in the palace gardens, and the gardeners there were very surprised by his knowledge. Elanor was diligent in her duties of waiting on Queen Arwen, and was filled with pride during those times of day that she was called on by the Queen.

One day they were all in the bright courtyard which had flowers flowing out of pots hanging from the archways, leading in to the formal gardens beyond. The hobbit children were in a group trying to catch a ball which the giant forms of Pippin and Merry were sailing over their heads, until Eldarion joined in with his hobbit friends, and managed to snatch the ball out of the air. Then he passed it to the older children there, and Faramir Took eventually caught it and ran away with it with all the other children jostling after him.

'They all get on so well,' Aragorn remarked to Sam.

'Aye, well they've practically grown up together,' Sam said smiling.

'Well I couldn't be more glad of my choice of counsellors, none more deserving in my opinion.' Aragorn smiled.

'I agree,' Arwen said by his side.

'Well I'm not sure I am really deserving of this Star you've given me,' Sam worried. 'I seem to hear my old Gaffer in my head calling me a ninnyhammer, and how I'll never amount to anything.'

'You can't still believe that though, Sam? Not after saving the world, and being Mayor for all these years? You've always been so positive in your thinking, and so full of hope, too, so you must be able to put those doubts from your father aside.'

'Well I guess that side of me comes from Mr. Bilbo, now he did believe in me, and taught me my letters, although my old Dad wasn't so happy about it. But he couldn't deny Mr. Bilbo anything leastways, and I was so inspired by his songs and tales.'

'Dear Bilbo, I wonder how he is?'

'Do you think he found healing in the Undying Lands? Will Mr. Frodo?' Sam frowned with concern.

'Bilbo certainly will and fast I should think,' Arwen said, 'Frodo was damaged physically and mentally, his healing may take far more time I feel. But be assured, Samwise, he will find it.'

'Thank you, Lady, that relieves my mind somewhat.' Sam breathed in a little sigh. He looked at the scene in the courtyard, Merry and Pippin still chasing after the children, Estella and Diamond sitting together, their heads close in deep conversation, and Rosie pregnant again, with baby Primrose on her lap, and Daisy playing with wooden blocks by her feet.

'I hate that he's missed out on all this.' Sam said softly.

One sunny day when Sam was sitting with Goldilocks and Hamfast, teaching them Elvish and Westron, in a large open ornate room, away from the normal hustle and bustle of the palace; the children were quietly scribbling on their tablets when Aragorn walked in. Sam was used enough to seeing his old friend that he didn't rise, but warmly welcomed him to sit beside him, instructing the children to carry on working.

'What a lovely domestic scene, Sam,' Aragorn smiled. 'I'm sure there were days when you never thought days like this would ever come.'

'Too true, Aragorn.' Sam admitted.

Aragorn gazed at his old friend, 'it's so important I think for them to learn to read and write.'

'Aye. I'm certain my life would have turned out very differently if Mr. Bilbo had never taught me,' Sam nodded.

'Do you ever regret that Sam?'

Sam looked up into Aragorn's face, quite plainly, 'Never. If I'd never been inspired by Mr. Bilbo's tales about elves, I might have never gone with Mr. Frodo at all. I wouldn't change that. If Mr. Frodo had gone off without me...' He shuddered, 'it doesn't bear thinking about.'

Aragorn gazed again at the children still hard at work, 'You miss him, Sam?'

It wasn't really a question, but Sam could only nod and wipe away a tear with his sleeve. In a voice only the man could hear, he whispered, 'I miss him more than anything. I think about him all the time. My life is whole like he wanted for me, but... I do still feel torn in two, as it were.'

Aragorn placed a hand on his shoulder, 'Your day will come, Sam. You will see him again someday, I know it.'

Sam nodded with a little half smile. Then he looked up again, 'The other day, a few weeks ago...'

'Yes?'

'Well I heard the sea, and I was standing on my front doorstep, miles and miles from it.'

Aragorn nodded, 'Well that confirms it, don't worry Sam. One day you will answer the call of the sea, and when it does call you I will be very happy for you.'

# # #

The garden was full of flowers and the hot sun was beating down. Insects flew between the blooms, and scent of the flowers was strong on the air.

Gandalf blew out a puff of smoke. Frodo wondered absently where the old wizard had gotten the pipeweed from.

'So tell me again what happens in this dream of yours?' Gandalf asked.

'I claim the Ring and kill Sam with it,' Frodo felt sick. 

'Is it always Sam?'

'Yes. Is that significant?' He looked up into the familiar face. Gandalf had decided to not change his appearance, so that the hobbits would be comforted by a face they were accustomed to.

'It might be.' Another puff of the pipe, 'what do you feel at that moment, in the dream that is?'

Frodo sighed gazing at the flowers again, ' Exultation, like it's the best thing in the world.'

'And that worries you?'

'Of course it worries me, he's the best friend I've ever had! I would died without him!'

'I can understand the Ring making you feel bad, and making you contemplate killing those you love, Frodo.' Gandalf said, 'what is interesting, is that this dream is always the same.'

'It's not always the same, Gandalf...'

'Ah! But it is always Sam, though, is it not?' Gandalf's eyes sparkled in the glorious sunshine of the Undying lands.

'Yes. I suppose. Is that significant?'

'I really think it is. Tell me Frodo, honestly, when you put on the Ring on Mount Doom how did it feel?'

Frodo ground his teeth, 'Do we have to talk about this?'

'I'm sorry, my dear hobbit, but I really think we do.'

Frodo sighed and put his head in his hands. Gandalf sat waiting patiently for the hobbit to order his thoughts. 'Well at first, I felt, well larger than I really was, I felt this pulsating power pour through me, it was totally unlike the times I'd worn the Ring before.

'But immediately I was aware of him, and his full gaze was on me and it was crushing, and, and terrible...'

'Go on.'

'I was aware of everything, exactly where I was in Middle Earth, and the battle at the gate, Baradûr, the eye, everything. It was like my head had been cut open and expanded to fill the whole of Mordor and beyond. I felt like I could see anything if I just bent my will to see it.'

'Good. We're getting somewhere. So could you see Sam in all this? Were you aware of him being there?'

Frodo looked at the flowers but somehow he seemed to be seeing through them into past visions and ancient times, 'I, I don't remember being aware of him at all.'

'I see.'

'Well I don't.'

'In your dream, you put on the Ring but are immediately filled with the urge to kill Sam, but when you actually did put on the Ring, in the place that it was at its strongest, you lost sight of him certainly, but there were no murderous thoughts about Sam at all.'

'That's true,' Frodo said slowly. 'But what does that mean?'

Gandalf puffed thoughtfully for a few minutes. Then he turned to Frodo sitting on the garden bench beside him. 'What are your feelings towards Sam, Frodo?'

For some reason Frodo blushed and looked away, 'What has that to do with it?'

'You need to stop resisting this,' Gandalf said gently, 'I think your feelings, in this instance, have _everything,_ to do with it.'

Frodo fiddled with his nine fingers nervously, staring at them as if they were the most interesting thing in the world.

'I think,' Gandalf said, 'If you can be honest about how you actually feel, to yourself, then these disturbing dreams will cease.'

Frodo sighed and leaned his head against the wall of the smial behind him, his eyes were shut, and he allowed himself to imagine Sam in his mind's eye. The way he saw him before he left.

'I love him,' he said quietly.

'Yes,' Gandalf agreed without any trace of surprise. 'And now you need to learn how to stop resisting that.'

'I really don't know how.'

'You need time, and we have plenty of time.' Gandalf put his hand on Frodo's shoulder, 'I will help you, you know.'

Frodo nodded silently.

'I also think it significant, that you lost awareness of Sam on Oroduin.'

'Why?'

'Tell me Frodo, you resisted the Ring for so long on that journey, what was it you clung to? What stopped you from just giving in?'

Frodo didn't answer, but unbidden rose an image in his mind of Sam kneeling, holding his hands, and kissing the knuckles with his soft lips.


	6. 1442 A year away from home

S.R. 1442 


It was nearing Elanor's 21st birthday, and the 23th anniversary of the destruction of the Ring, when the hobbit travellers approached the gleaming white marble city of Minas Tirith on their chestnut ponies. It was a wondrous sight for those who had travelled so far to see it, and all of them were gasping in wonder, even Sam who was seeing for the first time how the city had been healed of its hurts from the first time he'd been there.

When they approached the gates, they were opened smartly to the blast of silver trumpets, and Sam, Rose and their oldest six children were saluted by the elite guard. A reverence was given to Sam as Ring-bearer, and tributes given even before they entered into the city, and Rose couldn't help but gasp at the way they were being treated: the family of a hero returned to the city. Sam himself went crimson to the tips of his ears, but at the same time he bowed and nodded in acknowledgment, so that he didn't offend the people of Gondor. However inside he felt slightly sick at the thought that the true hero wasn't him, and never could be.

The city itself was far more open and carefree than Sam remembered, there were open gates, and through routes to upper levels he didn't remember seeing before. As they were escorted all the way to the Hall of Kings to see their friends, flowers were thrown at their feet in the streets, and cheers followed them all the way to the top of the long ride.

It was great to be with Aragorn and Arwen again. They stayed in apartments close to the King and his family, and they all had free run of the city during their stay. It was a very formative experience for all of them, but especially for the children, who felt like they were inside the Red Book, their Sam-Dad had always read to them.

A few months later they all left the city as Sam had been invited to visit the Prince of Ithillen, and he really wanted to see Faramir again. He also had made plans to take Elanor to see Loth Lórien, for a few weeks afterwards. They rode with an accompanying guard of Gondorians, and also Legolas and Gimli, who would ride with Sam and Elanor, on northwards to their own peoples for a bit.

They passed through the city of Osgiliath, and Sam was amazed by how much had been rebuilt there, although there was far more construction to do, but in parts it was already a bustling city with a marketplace and accommodations. They passed over the river Anduin, and when they got to the crossroads, Sam dismounted for a moment. The headless statue he'd seen with Frodo a few times before, was fully healed of his hurts, which made his spirits soar. Then he couldn't help but turn towards the east, somehow compelled to look in that direction.

Elanor was standing beside him, 'Is that...?' she asked.

'Yes Elanorellë, that's the way to the Morgul Vale.' He pulled his elven cloak tighter around his shoulders, and resolutely turned away.

The land of Ithillen was as lush and fair as Sam remembered it, and he looked around smelling the herbs and the clear air. Even the nearby mountains of the Ephel Dúath seemed to have lost their menace. He had so many good memories of this place, that the memory of darkness skittered away, as he entered into the town built for Faramir's company.

Faramir gave him a big hug in welcome, and Éowyn had many questions about Merry as she had not seen him for some time. It was a pleasant sunny place with large gardens, and all the hobbits really felt at their ease during their stay.

Sam took a lot of time to talk to Faramir on long walks through the gardens, and outside the town, and they talked long during the nights talking about Frodo, and their lives since the War of the Ring.

One day Prince Faramir walked alongside him pointing out various improvements he'd made to the home he'd built here for his company of Rangers and his family. Then the conversation turned to purging the effects of Mordor.

'We've even been in the Morgul Vale,' he was saying, and the foulness is reduced but it will not be clean in my lifetime, unfortunately.' He seemed quite wistful, 'you may visit it if you wish...'

'If it's all the same to you I'd rather not enter that valley again, Mr. Faramir,' Sam shuddered at the thought.

'I can't blame you,' Faramir smiled, 'we did go up the road to the pass of Cirith Ungol. There was no sign of the terror you met there, but we did see the destruction you had wrought upon the gate.'

'I'll glad we did some good then,' Sam said pulling his cloak tighter around himself.

'You still mean to travel to Lórien?'

'Aye, Elanor wants to see it.' He looked up, 'you don't mind Rose staying here, do you, it's too far for her to be travelling at the moment.'

Faramir smiled, 'She will be very well looked after here, Master Samwise.'

Elanor came running up just then from the house, Gimli and Legolas following behind with the pregnant Rose between them. Their care of Sam's wife caused Sam to smile in heartfelt appreciation.

'Are we going tomorrow, Sam-Dad?' the twenty-one old maid hobbit said with joy.

'Yes, Elanor. We will see your name-sake.' he smiled.

'And we are very happy to accompany you.' Legolas smiled, we will head on to our own lands, but we will be back in Minas Tirith before you leave.'

'There's no way we'd miss it, indeed,' agreed Gimli, 'our Fellowship will always be stronger than any group has a right to be.' he laughed with joy, patting Sam on the shoulder affectionately.

'I wish I could come with you,' Rose said.

'Éowyn will be glad of your company, Mistress Rose,' Faramir said softly.

'I hate to part with any of you,' Sam sighed. He turned to Rose, 'I will see you in Gondor in a few months, my love.'

'I will miss you, Sam,' she said throwing her arms around him.

Sam set off the following morning with Elanor, Legolas and Gimli. They rode north, but avoided the Dead Marshes, but Sam couldn't avoid the sight of the destroyed Black Gates, and the watch towers there. Beyond the gates Mount Doom seemed blackened and dead. Sam shuddered and looked away, and Elanor watched him with concern as they rode north, for the next few days he seemed somewhat withdrawn, and his sleep was restless. However her concern was alleviated in the end as they got further north, Sam reverted to his old self again, and no one questioned his previous sombre mood.

Eventually they passed through thick woodland to the east bank of the river, and there elven boats were waiting for them to carry them over.

Celeborn himself greeted them, and Elanor used her best Sindarin to answer in kind, which caused a deal of appreciation in the elves there.

Elanor loved Lórien. The giant mallorn trees looming over her head, the elanor flowers under her feet she felt like dancing and would twirl and whirl through the glades and trees.

Sam, Legolas and Gimli felt the shadow of something else. When in Lórien before, there had been an autumn feel to the place, but now it was winter, and it saddened them to see how the place was fading before their eyes.

Celeborn spent plenty of time with his visitors, and they all took meals together. 

After a week, Legolas and Gimli left to head on northwards, and it was a sad parting for Sam.

'We will see each other again, Sam,' smiled Legolas, 'In Minas Tirith, and perhaps after that too.'

'Goodbye Sam!' Gimli said gruffly, 'safe journey home!'

'Goodbye my friends.' Sam said with tears in his eyes.

Sam and Elanor stayed for another week, and the night before they left Celeborn sought Sam out. 'My time here is ending,' he said walking alongside Sam through the trees.

Sam sighed, 'It's all fading isn't it?'

'Yes, the power of the Three is gone, but a little remains for a short time.' He stopped and looked at Sam, night was falling fast, and and Sam's cloak seemed to disappear into the gloom. 'My time for sailing from the Havens is coming, Samwise. I begin to long to see my wife and daughter again.'

Sam said nothing as he thought about this.

'You feel drawn to the West too, do you not?'

'There's no point denying it I suppose.' Sam said softly.

Celeborn turned his face towards the west, towards the sun setting towards the distant Misty Mountains, 'One day we will both be ready Samwise, and on that day, I would be honoured for you to accompany me.'

Sam blushed in confusion gratified to hear this invitation,' But Lord Celeborn, I'm not ready yet.'

'Of course not,' Celeborn smiled, 'That day is not yet. I will weary of this land and its hold on my heart, but that day is not this one.' He looked fully at Sam then, and suddenly Sam realised that Celeborn completely understood.

'Well,' he said, 'In that case I would be honoured as well.'

'Well then, Samwise, I look forward to our next meeting.'

Elanor was sad to take her leave of Celeborn and Lórien, but she was so grateful she'd been able to visit. Sam seemed quite withdrawn again, but as they headed south on their ponies, he was soon singing happily again, and she thought no more of it.

They returned to Minas Tirith, and were reunited with Rose and the other children, and later on that year in October, Tolman Gamgee was born, but was called Tom, like his uncle. In February the next year, the family left their friends behind. Sam stopped at the wall and looked back at the gleaming white city of Kings, and then turned away to never see that fair edifice again.

# # # #

Frodo and Bilbo were staying in Avalónnë enjoying the busy nights of feasting and singing. The elves treated them with great respect, and Frodo enjoyed the quiet conversations with Elrond and his household, whilst they were visiting there. He'd been quite nervous talking to Celebrían and hearing about her awful experiences at the hands of orcs in Middle Earth. At the same time after quiet talks with her he was comforted by how healed she seemed to be after her experiences. Their evenings were spent by the fireside, dozing or just listening to the songs and tales, with no pressure to join in, but both of them did at times, especially Bilbo who spent a lot of time composing his next work.

Frodo also enjoyed walking far and wide throughout the gardens accessible from their apartment. These gardens went far and wide around the buildings of the town, and he was free to wander where he liked, no one had any restrictions. When Bilbo was very busy with his elf friends and writing songs, Frodo would ramble away from their apartment going further and further afield.

On this particular day he happened upon a very well-ordered garden with benches and pavements going through flowerbeds and trellises. Trailing honeysuckle screened parts of the garden, a soft breeze brushed the flower petals together as they drifted towards Frodo's wandering hands. The sun beat down and the colours of the various blooms distracted him, and made him wonder whether any of these could be added to his own garden by the beach. Suddenly he was aware that someone was behind him, and he whirled around to find Lady Galadriel was gliding towards him, and a sweet smile rested on her lips..

'Lady,' he said formally bowing to her.

'Well-met, Frodo Baggins,' she smiled. 'Will you come with me?' She waved her hand down the path of the garden to an area he could not see.

Curiously he followed her winding down the stone-paved path, trailing ivy dropped and caressed his shoulders as he pushed past, but Galadriel seemed to move effortlessly past the flower-packed trellises, and navigated the winding path with ease. Then they entered into a round area with curved benches around the edge, and Frodo immediately recognised the pedestal and basin structure in the middle.

'You once looked in my mirror,' she said. 'This is a different sort as you may hear things as well as see them, will you look?' She saw his apprehension, and her eyes softened, 'do not fear, you will not see anything which can distress you this time.'

'I trust you, Lady. So I will look.' Frodo climbed on the dais and peered over the into the water.

For a moment he saw nothing, and then the picture dissolved and he seemed to see the round green door of Bag End. A cross-looking hobbit was striding up to the door and was loudly demanding to see the Mayor. The door opened but Frodo gasped in surprise for standing there was Tom Cotton, Rosie's brother. 'What's all this then?' the hobbit demanded.

'Where is Sam?' Frodo asked out loud.

Tom walked out of Bag End closely followed by his wife Marigold and several children, one of which was a baby in a sling carried around her middle. Frodo recognised Marigold as Sam's younger sister.

'You ain't the Mayor! I need 'im now!' the stranger spat, 'where is he then?'

'He ain't here,' Marigold said flatly, 'you have to deal with Tom, instead.'

'I'm acting Mayor,' nodded Tolman Cotton. 'Mayor Samwise has gone off on a long journey, he won't be back for a long time so you deal with me, or no one, so what's it to be?'

The Mayor is my Daddy,' piped up one of the cluster of children.

Tom walked off with the stranger, still arguing about the lack of a proper Mayor, they left Bag End's garden, still arguing. Marigold watched them go with a huff and a shrug of her shoulders. Looking rather harassed she looked around at the children in the garden, 'Sammie!' She called one of the children over who was quite a bit older than the rest, 'Go find cousin Hamfast and Bilbo, no doubt they're up the Hill somewhere but it's nearly teatime!'

'Yes, Ma,' answered the child addressed as Sammie, said and ran off up the garden.

Marigold quickly snatched up a toddler from the flower bed, 'Now stop that Ruby Gamgee,' she scolded, 'your Dad wants the soil for his roses, not in your mouth! Daisy! Primrose! Come here, time to wash your hands for tea.'

Daisy held out a flower of her name-sake, 'This is for you, Aunty Marigold.'

'Well aren't you a treasure Daisy Gamgee! You're just like your Aunty Daisy when she was your age.' Daisy flushed with pride, and took her sister's hand before entering Bag End.

The tweenager called Sammie returned then with two boy hobbits, 'I found them, Ma!'

'Just in time,' Marigold said bustling into the house her hand holding on to the toddler Ruby. 'Robin will be waking up for his supper soon, isn't that right babe?' She said smiling at the baby in the sling.

The picture dissolved, and then Frodo was seeing the Hall of the Kings in Minas Tirith and Aragorn was on the throne with Queen Arwen at his side. As usual her beauty took Frodo's breath away. Frodo could see Legolas and Gimli standing to one side both with huge grins on their faces.

Frodo then gasped as the doors were thrown open and an announcement was made, 'Presenting, Mayor Samwise Gamgee of the Shire and Mistress Rose!' In came Sam who was well dressed and looking at ease in the clothes and in the setting. By his side was Rose, and behind them followed six younger hobbits, the eldest girl had long golden hair, the oldest boy looked like Sam as a lad. The announcer introduced Elanor, Frodo, Rose, Merry, Pippin and Goldilocks. Rose-lass looked so much like Rosie that Frodo gasped at the resemblance, Merry and Pippin, seemed to be as figity as their name-sakes, and Goldilocks was aptly named with her golden ringed hair bouncing around her head.

But most of all Frodo looked at Sam as he walked towards the dais. There were wrinkles on his face and wisps of grey in his hair, and Frodo wondered at how much older he looked.

'Your Majesties!' Sam said bowing formally to the throne. Rose and the children all bowed and curtsied formally, and they all seemed to be very practised at it.

'Welcome back, Samwise Gamgee, Ring-bearer!' King Elessar said formally, then he relaxed and smiled. Then he and Arwen rose from the throne and walked down to the arriving hobbits. Aragorn hugged Sam, and Arwen hugged Rose. 'Are you expecting again?' she asked her.

'Yes,' Rosie blushed, 'this one's not due for seven months though.'

'Congratulations!' Arwen hugged her again like they were old friends.

Then Elanor came forward, 'I am here to fulfil my promise to you my Queen!' the tweenager pronounced and she curtsied very low.

'I'm so glad to see you again my dear.' Arwen smiled. 'Eldarion here, will show you to your rooms.' A young man appeared from the back of the hall, and hugged Frodo and Elanor.

Happy to see their friend again, the children filed out of the room, meanwhile Sam had been greeting Gimli and Legolas with hugs, and he turned to Rose, 'Rosie, I'd like you meet Legolas and Gimli.'

Rose came over to them, 'Oh! I've heard so much about you!' she gasped, clapping her hands in delight.

'And we about you,' Legolas smiled.

Then Gimli surprised her by lifting her up in his arms with a whoop of joy.

'Now, now,' said Arwen,' she needs a proper sit down after the long journey!' and she linked her arm with Rosie's and the two of them walked off together, already talking like close friends.

'Come Sam, I have something I want to show you,' Aragorn said. He led his fellowship friends into an adjoining chamber which Frodo recognised. There Aragorn took off his robe and crown, and showed Sam over to a table with a set of drawings on it.

Sam looked at the drawings for a minute and gasped.

'We're going to put the statue in the marketplace,' Aragorn said quietly with a comforting hand on Sam's shoulder.

Sam said nothing for a few minutes, and then the tears started to flow down his cheeks, 'Oh Strider! It looks just like him!'

Legolas smiled in sympathy, 'You still miss him, Sam?'

'I miss him so much everyday, Legolas!' Sam sobbed.

'Sam! Sam!' Frodo shouted at the image, but then it faded, and he was back in the garden with Galadriel. 'It was a statue, of me!' he cried.

'They do well to honour you,' she smiled.

He looked up at her, 'But why is Sam so much older? Is this the future?'

'I think not, these events might come to pass soon, or may have only recently come to pass but they aren't a distant future. Time flows differently here in the Undying Lands, Frodo. For your Sam over twenty years have passed. How many years do you think it has been since you arrived here?'

'If I had to guess, I'd say about seven years or so...'

'As you see,' she said expansively, spreading her hands, 'you have not as long to wait as Samwise does. Take comfort from that.'

'I will Lady, thank you.'

As Frodo walked slowly back to the apartment he shared with Bilbo, he walked through the trees and gardens, pondering on what he'd just witnessed. He'd definitely seen all of Sam and Rose's children, and Sam had been visiting Gondor. He'd looked so much more confident, and had sounded it too, the years of being Mayor had certainly had an effect on his friend. Frodo was amazed at how much older he'd looked but yet, he'd seemed to have a sort of inner light shining out of him, which no one else there had seemed to see. What did that mean? Frodo shook his head at the idea, was he seeing the effect of the Ring like it had affected Bilbo and himself? He'd always assumed Sam hadn't been affected by it after having it for such a short time. But always his mind was dragged back to the unbelievable joy of seeing Sam again, seeing him happy and whole with his family was so wonderful, but yet it made his heart ache. He'd seen Sam's distress and loss missing his former master, so he perhaps wasn't as happy as Frodo hoped he was.

Frodo stopped in his tracks for a moment as a terrible feeling of guilt came over him, as he realised the selfish part of himself that secretly wanted Sam to miss him, wanted him to yearn to be reunited and cross the sundering seas. Tears stung his eyes, but yet hope filled his heart too as he struggled with these conflicting emotions. He took a deep breath and looked at the blue sky, trying to centre his emotions again. He wiped his eyes, he wasn't even sure what it was he was hoping for, he berated himself. In that moment he knew, Gandalf was right: he needed to sort out these tangled emotions, and stop avoiding the issue. What did he really want? Despite this realisation he knew the whole issue was too painful to think about in that moment, so he determinedly headed back walking straight and tall, and contemplated what he would tell Bilbo, delaying the matter of his own heart.

Later sitting in the warm sitting room, Bilbo gasped, 'Thirteen children!'

'Yes I think so, Bilbo.'

'And one is named for you, and another for me?'

'Yes.'

'Well in that case, I will welcome Sam with open arms when he comes.'

Frodo had to laugh, and so did Bilbo.

However retiring to bed that night, Frodo didn't hardly sleep as emotions and desires he'd avoided thinking about, were suddenly in the forefront of his mind.


	7. 1451 The past revisited

S.R. 1451 


The party field hadn't looked so good since the famous party celebration of Bilbo and Frodo Baggins which had by this time gone down in legend as the standard to set all other celebrations by. Still by any standard this was going to be an event to remember, and a vast collection of hobbits had laboured all night to prepare a great feast on the field under the famous golden-leaved mallorn tree the size of which was now impressive indeed.

A harassed Samwise Gamgee, Mayor of the Shire four times running, was frantically doing the finishing touches to the most enormous wedding cake he'd ever made. He needn't have made it himself of course, having now a number of servants attending Bag End on a daily basis, but it wasn't everyday your eldest child got married, and he was damned if anyone else was going to make it.

'Oh Sam!' gasped Rosie, 'It truly is magnificent!'

Sam wiped the sweat from his brow, 'Well now we have to get it down there in one piece!'

Rose threw her arms around her husband's neck, 'Oh, Darling! How did we manage to do so well?'

Sam smiled but didn't answer, the true answer to such a question would perhaps take all day.

Rose grabbed Tom and Nibs, to carry the cake carefully to the field, whilst Sam retired to their room to change into his formal wear. He had long since stopped thinking of the master bedroom of Bag End as Frodo's room, but on this day he raised his head, and spoke to the quiet air, 'I wish you could have been here for this, me dear.' He sighed and carried on buttoning his waistcoat.

He looked up into the mirror, but as he stared he no longer saw his reflection, he seemed to see a figure sat in the parlour, the curly head bent forward looking down, a baby Elanor in the crook of his curled left arm. The right four-fingered hand splayed over her tiny body, but not touching as if avoiding the touch of that mutilated flesh on the fragile babe. The stocky arm reaching out, the baby's fist lifting up, the tiny fingers grabbing and squeezing the extended forefinger, gripping tightly to it in a defiant way. His mouth falling open exposing trembling lips, the dark sleep-deprived rings around his eyes, the skin too tight across prominent cheekbones, the single tear tracking down the too pale delicate face.

Suddenly Rosie burst into the room and Sam looked up startled, his jacket hanging from nerveless fingers. 'Aren't you ready yet?' She exclaimed, before seeing his face. 'No!' she cried in sympathy, 'don't use your sleeve!' She crossed over to him, and pulled out his handkerchief to dab at his face for him. She hugged him and kissed him, 'You should come out and see her, she looks as pretty as a posy of flowers!'

Sam caught his breath, 'I'll be out in a minute, Rosie.'

She smiled and nodded and went out. Sam looked in the mirror again, but only saw himself staring back. He put on his jacket and squared his shoulders, he stared for a moment out of the window, his fingers gripping the sill. He gazed at the flowers in the garden blowing against each other in the wind. He concentrated on watching them, as he calmed his beating heart to a normal rhythm before sighing and following after his wife.

Arm in arm the parents of the bride walked down the aisle with the blushing bride between them, Fastred Fairbairn her intended, was waiting along with half of Hobbiton, and many from all across the Shire who knew the Mayor and his family, including the Master of Buckland and the Thain of the Shire.

Later after the feast, Sam stood up to address the crowd of hobbits sat around formal tables, on this sunny spring day. 'Thank you you all for coming, my dear friends and family. I'm so proud of Elanor she's such a delight to all our lives. I also want to welcome Fastred into our family, I know he is going to make my dear Elle, a very happy wife!' The crowd cheered at this, and Sam toasted the bride and groom. He was very used to public speaking by this time, and knew long speeches were less appreciated, he also suffered no nerves at doing this kind of thing anymore, it was as normal as breathing.

Sam allowed a few tears to fall, and there was much toasting of the happy couple mainly started by the Thain, who definitely had had a bit too much wine at this point.

'Maybe we should do something,' Merry whispered in Sam's ear, when it looked like Pippin was about to fall off the chair he was standing on. 

Both of them moved closer but Diamond was there first, blushingly pulling Pippin down from his perch, whereupon he threw his arms around her head and gave her a resounding kiss in front of the whole company. Sam laughed with the rest at Diamond's red-faced embarrassment.

Sam signalled the hobbits who were employed to organise the occasion that it was time for the dancing to start, and the tables were rapidly pushed back, for the younger hobbits to file on to the grass, and the band struck up a traditional tune.

The dancing went on for some time, and Sam enjoyed several dances with Rosie, and Elanor, and then with all his daughters, except Goldilocks who'd seemed to have disappeared somewhere.

He set off to find out where his daughter was, and went around the back of the tents set up in the field. He ended up finding her behind the kitchen tent with Faramir Took in a passionate embrace.

His mouth fell open at the sight of his daughter with the Thain's son, who took one look at the Mayor, and ran off at Sam's frowning face before Sam could utter a word. He glared at his daughter, but she only blushed happily, despite his stern features. She ran after Faramir back towards the dancing, and Sam sighed. Suddenly he felt too hot, and he removed his jacket. He was next to the edge of the field and there was a gate into the next field, and he was drawn suddenly towards it. He went through and crossed to the other side of the neighbouring field to the foot of a large oak tree, and he sank down to the roots, and sat with his back resting against the trunk.

He leaned his head back and looked up into the swaying branches above him, a light breeze rustling the leaves, and cooling his hot skin. He allowed his eyes to shut as his listened to the birds wheeling in the sky above him, the soft brush of the grasses, the delicate birdsong, the murmur of hobbit voices in the party field, and the distant music of the band, striking up a different tune. But there was something else too, underneath it all: a distant sigh, and as he listened to it the sound became more distinct, a sighing surging swish of waves upon a distant shore, and underneath it a faint voice, but despite his concentration he could not make out the words. Ears straining to hear, struggling to bring the sounds into focus, when suddenly a loud cheer went up from the group of hobbits, and the birds in the tree above Sam were startled into a squawking flight, and Sam's eyes flew open. His heart racing, he panted as if he'd been running fast, and his right hand flared into a blasting burning heat, and as he tried to look at it he was blinded by a bright light, and he squeezed his eyes shut and looked away.

As suddenly as the sensation had started, it was gone and he was only left with a dull irritation in his hand, and he rubbed the area with his left hand. Had he imagined that bright light? Another shout went up in the party field and Sam suddenly remembered his duties as father of the bride, and he got up, dusting himself down. He shrugged himself back into his jacket, and headed back to spend the afternoon greeting all the guests, and listening patiently to everything they had to say, forgetting the incident completely.

He stood next to Rosie as Elanor and Fastred left, they waved goodbye to their thirty year old daughter, the first to leave home, the carriage disappearing down the Hill.

As the day drew on, the guests all drifted away leaving the party, and hobbits started packing up the tables and tents. The sun was sinking in the sky, as Sam sat on a bench amongst the debris of the day with Merry and Pippin, and he brought up the subject of Faramir and Goldilocks with his friends. The setting sun shone across the sky, its golden light falling on Sam, and Merry happened to be staring straight at Sam, when he noticed Sam absently rubbing his right hand with his left, as if it was paining him, and as Merry stared wide-eyed, the sun dipped lower and Sam was an ordinary hobbit once more, his hands now relaxed in his lap. Merry shook his head in confusion, had he imagined it? For just a moment he was sure his friend had been glowing, but was it a trick of the light? He made a mental note to keep a close eye on Sam, and he narrowed his eyes as he wondered about the vision he'd seen.

'She's only twenty, Pippin!' Sam was saying with a frown of concern.

Pippin waved a hand drunkenly, he'd clearly not seen anything unusual about his friend, 'Are you honestly telling me you never kissed a lass at their age, Sam, really?'

'I just think it's too young, that's all' Sam muttered.

'If it's only kissing, it's all fine, Sam.' Merry assured him, 'but you two might want to keep an eye on them for a while. Now your Frodo, I saw creeping off with that Poppy Hardbottle lass earlier, you may want to be more concerned about that.'

'Perhaps I should give him more work to do in the garden,' mused Sam.

'Doesn't he do most of it already?' Pippin looked at his friends owlishly.

'I think you need to sober up Pip,' Merry said firmly.

# # # 

Frodo wandered around the market absently looking for the items that Bilbo had requested. Gandalf silently walking alongside him watching how frequently Frodo looked up out to sea, the boats darting around in the harbour, the sun reflecting off the shimmering surface.

'So when was the last bad dream, Frodo?' Gandalf asked at last when they were finally on the road back to smial Frodo shared with Bilbo.

'Well they faded over time and didn't seem so bad.' Frodo mused, 'and over the past few years they've come far less frequently. The last was over six months ago I guess.'

'Did you think long and hard about your feelings for Sam?'

'Yes,' Frodo said quietly. 'But I think it's more than that. I think I need to forgive myself.'

'For what my dear boy?'

Frodo stopped and looked at the old wizard. 'For giving in, Gandalf. I carried it so far, but I gave in at the very end,' he sighed.

'Are you really surprised by that? I once told you that no one could willingly give it up, and there in that place it would be impossible for any mortal to do that.'

Frodo raised an eyebrow at this. 'So you sent me off to do a job, you knew I couldn't do?'

'I trusted to a force, beyond you, I'm afraid.' Gandalf paused and cast his eyes around the green sun-drenched landscape, 'I did you a disservice, by risking your life and your immortal soul, not to mention your health and happiness.' He sighed, 'that is one part of my role in this I do not look on with satisfaction.

'I trusted to fate, a fate which pulled the Ring into Bilbo's hand, something outside of the reason of any of us, that could only be guessed at. A fate which could inspire a very small hope that somehow the quest could be achieved. I'm sorry Frodo, that you should have paid the price in all this, had I known how high that price would be, then perhaps I may have hesitated... but I do believe _you_ were the only one who could have achieved this. Do you not see my dear hobbit, how you managed to resist the thing through despair, and exhaustion, and hunger and thirst? That is your ultimate achievement: to get the thing there, to that place despite the hardships, that was your total crowning glory, and no one else I believe could have got there. So no, you did not fail, you succeeded against the odds, and you need to recognise that.'

They walked on in silence for a moment, whilst Frodo digested this. 'I would not have got there at all without Sam,' he said quietly.

'And that was Sam's role. Yours was to resist to the very last, his was to get you there, and Gollum's role was to destroy it. All three of you were necessary.'

Frodo glanced away, a giant eagle was wheeling above the distant white-peaked mountains, he watched it for a moment until it had disappeared. 'I think Gollum's death was my fault.'

'How so?'

'I, I told him if he should touch me again he would fall into the fire, and that is what happened.'

'You didn't make him attack you, Frodo,' Gandalf said reasonably. 'You told me that he swore on the Ring not to harm you, you also told me you warned him that the Ring was treacherous, and that the promise was binding. You could have done no more, you are not responsible for his choices. They are his choices alone, and you did all you could to warn him. If fate stepped in at all, it was in the circumstance of him having to swear on it, or by it perhaps. Even so, such a promise could have been undone if you or Sam had ever killed Gollum, and the fate of all of us would be rather different now.'

'I pitied him and spared his life, was that fated, too?'

'No that was all you. You could have made a different choice, but your pity of him, your willingness to give him a chance of making different choices, is what saved your soul. He condemned his own by giving into the greed and lust the Ring had given him.'

'And, and Sam spared him too...' Frodo mused.

'Indeed, Sam's short time with the Ring gave him an insight to the damage the Ring had done to Gollum. Indeed, if Sam had not been a Ring-bearer, he would have most likely killed Gollum on the slopes of Mount Doom.'

'And the Quest would have failed.'

'Yes, but Sam spared him just as you did, he saved his own soul, despite the damage the Ring had done to him. He too, will need healing from that when the time comes, but through his own pity there is hope for that healing yet.'

'But he only had the Ring for a short time, did it really cause that much damage?' Frodo frowned at the thought of Sam being unduly affected by the thing.

'He bore the burden on the outskirts of Mordor, Frodo. Just where the strength of it was building, he couldn't resist using it and more than once, too. I feel no doubt he is an excellent fellow, but he would not have lasted against its evil for as long as you did, I'm sure.'

'But he did resist the temptation when he crossed into Mordor.' Frodo felt it his duty to remind, the old wizard.

'Yes, his hobbit-sense won through, and also his desperation to find you helped him, but I have no doubt in different circumstances the battle would have been too much for him.'

'I didn't notice it having an effect on him though,' Frodo said thoughtfully.

Gandalf looked at Frodo with his bright eyes, 'After he had it, he asked for it back didn't he? More than once?'

'Well yes, but... he wanted to help me.'

'I'm sure that was the way the Ring was working on him to be sure. It was open to any weakness, and to the Ring, love is a weakness.'

Frodo shook his head at this statement, but didn't reply.

'Of course the Ring was wrong,' Gandalf mused. 'Your love for Sam was probably the only thing which kept you resisting at the end.' He looked at Frodo again, 'is that not so?'

Frodo sighed softly. 'Yes,' he answered at last.

'This is the final hurdle, Frodo. If you can forgive yourself, and allow yourself to give into the very real love for Sam, which is the one thing which saved you, then you will be truly free of its evil.'

'All right, Gandalf,' Frodo said, 'I will try.'


	8. 1455 Family and Love Poetry

S.R. 1455 


Pippin rode into Hobbiton with Diamond, Faramir and his three daughters, Pearl, Esme, and Bella. They were staying at Bag End this year for the Birthday celebrations. It had become a tradition among the traveller families to celebrate Bilbo and Frodo's birthday every year, and if the old gaffers of the neighbourhood shook their heads at such a thing, none of them took much notice. Merry and his family were away in Rohan this year, and so would be missing the celebrations.

Bag End was as busy and as full of life as ever as they arrived, and Sam took charge of their ponies. Frodo had married Poppy two years previously and they'd become the Gardner family with Sam's blessing. Most of the children still lived there as well, Merry-lad had moved to Crickhollow, and Rosie-lass was living in New Row, in preparation for her upcoming marriage in the spring. Pippin-lad was living away at Tighfield apprenticed to Sam's cousin Anson.

As the Thain and his wife entered Bag End garden, Pippin was not surprised to see Frodo Gardner tending the garden, he was the main gardener at Bag End these days. Sam was getting too stiff to do it, and was very busy in his role as Mayor as well. Helping Frodo was Robin, who was also a keen gardener, and followed Frodo's every move, collecting up tools, and asking his big brother questions.  
Almost immediately Goldilocks flew out of the door of Bag End, and tucking her arm with Faramir's the two tweens ran up the hill for a walk.

There was a warm exchange between Diamond and Rose, before Daisy and Primrose drew Pippin's daughters to a quiet corner of the garden, laughing as they went.

Sam returned from stabling the ponies, and they all entered the smial taking their ease in the comfortable parlour. The kitchen maid brought in tea and cakes, and Ruby helped serve everyone.

Pippin couldn't help reflecting on how different the place was from when he was growing up, instead of a bachelor in a quiet hole, there was Hamfast and Bilbo running around in excitement, and baby Holfast lying in Poppy's arms crying for attention.

Merry had asked him a few years before to keep an eye on Sam when he saw him, but Pippin had never seen anything strange going on, and was starting to think Merry was imagining things. Indeed, Sam seemed very happy and relaxed. Indeed as he looked at him now surrounded by his extended family, Sam seemed to glow with happiness, and only at times did his eyes grow at all wistful when resting on the lively scene in front of him.

Later after tea Sam drew his friend into the study for a quiet chat, leaving the ladies to catch up on their own news. In the comfortable study of Bag End, on the floor sat thirteen year old Tom, who was diligently working on an elvish translation, having out-stripped his father in terms of Sindarin, was now working on Quenya with relish.

'So how long have Elanor and Fastred been living in Undertowers now, Sam?' Pippin asked sitting on the couch next to his friend.

'Well they were one of the first families to move out into the Westmarch after the King gifted it to the Shire, so about three years now. There was a dispute out there recently I need to tell you about. There's a family of Bolgers, and a family of Proudfoots, and seemingly they ended up in a border dispute, which actually resulted in a fight, and them both being brought before the sherrifs. Well Fastred is a sensible young hobbit and he tried to arbitrate the case, but neither of them want to recognise his authority. I can't be over there all the time to sort out disputes, and you have Tuckborough, and Merry has Buckland to look after, so it's really fallen on Fastred to take control there, acting in my name of course.'

'It sounds a tricky situation to be sure, but what do you want me to do about it, Sam?'

At this moment Goldilocks and Faramir crashed through the doors of the study. Sam couldn't help but notice the tweenagers were holding hands. 'Can we walk down to Hobbiton, Dad?' Goldilocks cried shaking her golden curls, 'Mam needs a few things, and I said we'd go.'

Sam hesitated looking at the two of them. 'Please Dad!' cried Faramir to Pippin.

'All right, Faramir,' Pippin said but make sure to ask your mother if she needs anything whilst you're there.'

There was a slightly disgruntled look on Faramir's face, but Goldilocks was already dragging him out of the room, in case Sam should voice an objection.

'Don't you worry about those two?' Sam asked, when they were out of earshot.

Pippin laughed, 'What harm can a couple of tweens get up to on the road, really, Sam?'

'They might leave the road,' Sam said gloomily. 

Pippin only laughed, 'Best get used to it Sam, there's no getting in between those two, and us putting up objections will only backfire, I'm sure.'

'I suppose so.'

'Dad? Do you know any Dwarvish? I was thinking I could learn it,' Tom piped up from his position on the floor.

Sam blinked then, it was a never-ending surprise to him that his youngest son should be such a scholar, 'I really don't know Tom, you'd have to talk to your Uncle Gimli about that.'

'Yes! Of course!' Tom sprang up, and ran out of the room, 'I'll write to him now!'

Sam shook his head, 'I really don't know where he gets it from.'

'Really, Sam? You were the only one in your family to learn to read, and in Westron and elvish too.'

'Even so...'

Through the window Sam heard the voice of Frodo Gardner, he seemed to be telling Bilbo and Hamfast to run down to New Row to ask Rose to come up for dinner.

'Did you mind Frodo changing his surname when he married, Sam?' asked Pippin.

'Nah, it's a bit of a tradition in our family to change the name, and the name is very appropriate after all.'

'He does keep the garden well for you,' Pippin smiled. 'Well now back to the issue at hand...'

'I was thinking that perhaps you could give Fastred a title, something official like. Just so his authority can't be questioned, and then we have an official presence in the Westmarch working for us.'

'You know that's not a bad idea!' Pippin settled back in his chair, 'how about the Warden of Westmarch? I could make it an inherited title too, so that little Elfstan will get it eventually too.'

'That would be perfect, thank you Pippin!'

The door of study opened and the toddler Holfast tottered in, 'Da, Da!' He said holding his arms out to his grandfather.

'It's so busy here, Sam!' laughed Pippin.

'Wait until you have grandchildren, Pippin!' Sam winked, 'But I wouldn't have it any other way.'

Much later in the day the sun was setting, and the smial was quiet. Sam and Pippin sat together on a stone bench smoking in silence in Bag End's well-tended garden.

'This the life eh, Sam?' said Pippin contentedly.

'Aye,' Sam said with another puff on his pipe.

'Do you think they are celebrating where they are? I often wonder what they are doing over there.'

'I wonder too, Pippin.' He looked out over the fields of Hobbiton, the puffs of smoke rising from chimneys, the growing mallorn: its golden leaves jangling in the wind. 'I hope he's happy.' Sam whispered to himself.

He relaxed and closed his eyes, and faintly in the distance, heard the crashing of waves upon the shore. He'd felt scared of the sound for the past few years and he'd tried not to listen to it. This time, however he couldn't block it out and there seemed to be almost a whisper in the sound but it was too faint to make out. He opened his eyes, but there was no burning pain or flash of light, but there almost was a serene sense of calm instead, and he sighed.

# # # #

The library in Elrond and Celebrían's palace-sized home was a vast sprawling room with high shelves, and reams and reams of books lining the walls and shelves.

Frodo was sitting a table on a large elf-sized chair, his feet swinging beneath him, several volumes laid out in front of him, his finger following the verse written there. He'd been living among elves long enough now to be fluent in Sindarin, and well-versed in Quenya, and he scanned the pages in front of him looking it seemed, for some inspiration.

Elrond walked into the library then and seeing Frodo he walked over and sat down greeting him warmly. He saw the slight crease between Frodo's brows and looked at the volumes laid out in front of the hobbit to try and see why the Ring-bearer might be troubled.

He picked one up, 'Love poetry?' He remarked, 'there is certainly much of that in here if you want to be inspired.'

Frodo blushed redly, 'My Lord,' he said in embarrassment.

Elrond looked at him keenly, 'Are you looking for something in particular?' he asked.

'Well I was looking to see what elves think, well, about a certain kind of love.'

'What kind is that, Frodo?' Elrond asked gently.

'Frodo gripped the table with his hands, 'Well, what do they say about love between males?'

Elrond smiled, 'Elves believe all love is sacred, no matter who it is between.'

Frodo looked up nervously, 'Even if it is romantic love?'

'Indeed, that is as wonderful as any other.' Elrond looked at the troubled hobbit, 'You are in love like that, Iorhael?'

'I think so. I also feel, ah, other things too. Gandalf advised me to let in love, so I could deal with the Ring-craving. I mean he was right, it's really helped, but...' he gasped tensely, 'it seems to have caused another kind of craving, one I can't do anything about.'

'There's nothing wrong in feeling desire for someone you love,' Elrond said gently.

'But, I don't have my love here, and, well, I have no reason to believe he'd ever feel the same way. He's married, with children, a family. Why would he ever leave any of that for me, or even have the same desires as me?'

Elrond considered this thoughtfully, ' You didn't know you felt this way when you were together?'

Frodo shook his head silently.

'How do you know that he did not do the same? It's possible to love more than one person. One effect of being in the Blessed Realm, is you can't hide from your own feelings and desires, if there is any similar feeling in your love when he arrives here, he will feel it too, just like you have.' He put his hand on Frodo's shoulder, 'I hope that knowledge gives you comfort.'

Later Frodo sat in the comfortable parlour reading Bilbo's latest verse. Bilbo had just got back from a visit with his elvish friends, and this was the latest work to come out of it.

'That's very inspired, Bilbo, I never knew you knew so much about romantic love.' Frodo said cheekily.

'I'm not entirely inexperienced you know, you young scamp!' Bilbo retorted good-humouredly.

'Did you never think about marrying Bilbo?' Frodo asked curiously.

'Who would put up with me, Frodo-lad?' Bilbo joked with a twinkle in his eye.

'Well, I don't know,' Frodo persisted. 'There must have been someone who would...'

'Well,' Bilbo said wistfully, 'to be honest with you I was never that interested in lasses.'

'Bilbo!' exclaimed Frodo in shock.

'Come on Frodo, you must have some experience in that area?' chided Bilbo.

Frodo blushed and didn't answer.

'That's what I thought! Well not really quite the thing in the Shire is it? Still things are different in elvish society, they are more free-thinking when it comes to love...'

'You're not saying...?'

'Never you mind, young lad! What about you? You had plenty of opportunity to settle down after I left.'

'It never seemed the right time, besides no lass I ever met had any interest outside of the narrow confines of the Shire. I found most of hobbit society sadly lacking much of the time, and very dull!'

'What about lads though? Any take your fancy?'

'Not for a long time, Bilbo.' Frodo said sadly.

There was a long pause, and Bilbo threw an apple core into the fire, where it crackled and burned in the flames.

'It seems a shame my dear, that no one ever touched your heart, put fire into your veins...'

Frodo didn't reply for a long time still staring into the flames. 'Well that's what I thought,' he said slowly.

'And now?'

'Now I'm not so sure.'

'So, you do want someone, a special someone?'

Frodo closed his eyes in a kind of pain, 'I do, but I don't think that he would ever... feel the same.'

Bilbo smiled and put his arm around the younger hobbit's shoulders. 'You know I have on occasion made a mistake, my lad.' Frodo looked up at his uncle, 'hard to believe I know,' Bilbo chuckled. 'Anyway if you want to take the advice from a very old hobbit, don't make the mistake I made: by never risking your heart, by keeping quiet. If they care about you, you needn't worry about rejection because you'll never lose them completely, but if you never try, you'll never know how they feel.'

'I'm not sure this will work in this case, Bilbo.'

'You don't know that, take the risk Frodo, because the reward could be enormous.'


	9. 1463 Whispers from the sea

S.R. 1463 


The large field behind the Great Smials was decked out for a grand wedding just has it had been on the day the Thain had wed so many years previously. However this time instead of being a mere guest, Sam was father of the bride, and the bride in question was nervously holding on to his arm as they waited for the signal to approach.

Sam looked at Goldilocks, 'Ready, love?'

She nodded, her white veil bobbing as she did so, she looked lovely in the white dress, and she was glowing under the veil, Sam had never seen her so happy.

The signal given, they moved forward, and proceeded down the aisle of seats, until Sam kissed his daughter's cheek and handed her over to the waiting groom in the person of Faramir Took.

Sam took his seat by Rose, and wiped away a happy tear.

After the ceremony Rose whispered in his ear, 'We really are one of the gentry now!'

Sam laughed at that, it was extraordinary how he'd gotten to this position in society really, his daughter marrying the Thain's son. That was something a gardener's son never expected.

The celebrations went on long into the night, large numbers of gentlehobbits from all across the Shire were in attendance, including many Tooks and Brandybucks. Also of course there were extended numbers of Cottons and Gamgees there as well, many of whom had never been to such a sprawling pile like the Great Smials, and were seen in the corridors exclaiming and commenting on every aspect of the place.

The evening ended with dancing in the great hall, hosted by the Thain, and the young hobbits joined into spinning and clapping with great gusto. Sam and Rosie were babysitting their grandchildren for much of the night, and quietly talking with their friends. Sam watched Fastred leading a beautiful pregnant Elanor on to the dancefloor, and they looked so graceful together, he hoped he could remember this moment forever. Then his daughter came over and asked her father for the next dance. Sam laughed and took her hand and they slowly danced together to the beat of the music.

'You seem sad, Sam-Dad,' Elanor said.

Sam looked up, 'I was just thinking that's all.'

'You were thinking about your treasure, weren't you?' she surmised cleverly.

It always surprised Sam how Elanor could always see right into his heart. She'd always called Frodo of the Ring as his “treasure”. Apart from Rose, she seemed to be the only other person in his family who completely understood his heart regarding his former employer.

'I wish he could have been here.' Sam said quietly.

'You're going to leave us one day, aren't you?' Sam didn't reply. They continued to dance around each other, not speaking for a moment. 'I know how much you miss him. You still hear the sea calling you?'

'It does. It calls louder and more frequently the older I get it seems.'

'And someday you will answer that call?'

'Would you be upset if I did?' Sam asked.

Elanor seemed to think about this, 'No Dad, I know you're here for us right now, but you need to make your heart whole in the end. We'll not always need you.'

'I love you, Elanorellë.'

'I love you too, Dad,' she said spinning him around in the dance.

Sam and Rosie had a guest bedroom in one of the better guest quarters, and they eventually retired to their room, happy but awfully tired.

It was late that night as the moon was waning in the sky when Sam sat bolt upright in bed gasping in shock. He looked at his aging but still pretty wife, and he hadn't disturbed her. Shakily he got out of bed and padded over to the window to look out. The bad dreams were coming more frequently now, and getting more disturbing. He rubbed his face, to try and erase the images from his mind.

As he gazed outside, the distant roar of the waves seemed to get louder in his ears, he'd gotten used to hearing it now, but the sound was coming more nights, often when the dreams came too, and each time it seemed a little more urgent, it was getting harder to tell the sound that he was happy to wait. This time however the words buried in the crash of the waves almost out of hearing, were more distinct than ever before. Sam concentrated desperately trying to make out the words. He listened hard, breathing slowly and calmly, suddenly aware of everything around him: the distant sound of the wind outside, Rosie's soft breathing, even his own laboured breaths. Then clear as day as if the words had been said into his ear, he heard the words: _I miss you, Sam_. He gasped in surprise, and Rose Gamgee woke up.

'What is it, Sam? Another bad dream?' She flew out of the bed towards him.

The sound was gone again and Sam turned into his wife's arms. 'Aye, the usual one, my love.'

She drew him back back down, sitting him on the bed next to her. Sam sighed, and looked round into her worried eyes. She always seemed to know how he was feeling.

'I know you hear the sound of the sea, and I get worried that one day it will call you out of the house, and you'll be gone completely.' she worried, her eyes filling with tears.

'I promise I won't, Rosie,' he said, holding her tightly. 'I'll not leave you.'

'Oh Sam!' she said hugging him back. 

'I'd never leave you, Rosie, you have to know that.' he said softly.

'I suppose I do. But I also know you want to go to Valinor, I know how much you miss him.'

'That will never make me leave you.'

'And if I'm gone,' she gulped at the thought, 'Would you go then?' Sam looked away towards the window. The sound of the waves was gone, but it remained in his memory, and the thought of it welled up in his mind, bringing a lump to his throat. Rosie watched him for a moment tearfully. Then she sighed, as if in defeat. 'You would go, wouldn't you, to see him?'

'Not just for that, Rosie,' Sam admitted. 'The Ring has affected me in some way, too. Sometimes I feel like I'd need to go in order to truly rest, if you know what I mean.'

'I'm beginning to,' she admitted.

They didn't speak for a moment. Sam sighed again and looked at his lovely wife, feeling so glad once again for her understanding temperament.

She wiped away a tear, and sighed in a determined manner, 'Promise me that if you do go, if you join him over the sea some day, that you will move on from me with him, me dear. I'm so grateful to be having you for these years, but if you find him again, don't let the memory of me hold you back from happiness.'

'I don't know what you mean, Rosie.' he said slightly alarmed. He didn't want her to think he would forget her and just move on without her.

'Promise me, Sam Gamgee, please! I need you to promise.'

'I promise,' Sam said pulling her in for a kiss.

# # # #

Frodo spent a lot of time tramping around in the fields, green rolling hills and woods around his home, by this time he was very comfortable in his own skin, and was often naked in the sun resting on a hot day. He found a secluded pool in the forest, where he would swim and relax. He wondered vaguely whether Sam would like visiting that place.

Frodo also loved to swim in the sea, especially at the end of a hot day working in the garden. Bilbo would shake his head sagely, but never commented on Frodo's habit of running down over the dunes of white sand at the end of the day.

This particular day the sun was low in the sky, and Frodo threw off his clothes and ran into the water naked, dipping and diving between the waves, with a huge feeling of joy and relief.

It had been a long time now that he'd felt completely at ease with himself, and the nightmares and ring-cravings were all things of the past. He finally felt healed in all senses of the word and he didn't feel the pressure of age, with a lithe fit strong body, and sun-tanned skin.

One major downside of feeling so young fit and healthy, was the physical want that so often plagued him however, and he strode out of the sea, water dripping down his naked body as he took himself in hand. It had taken him a long time to come to terms with the desire which filled him up, and the images which came to mind several times a day. He'd never imagined before coming to Tol Eressëa, that the thought of his gardener would make him feel so aroused. He'd had to accept it, and now he had. He stood looking out to sea as the sun dipped below the horizon, his shadow lengthening, and he gasped and came on to the sand, stroking himself through the climax, gasping Sam's name.

For a moment his hope seemed to die. He looked out at the sea, the waves foamed and swirled about his furry toes. He looked eastward, towards Sam, the sound of the waves crashing in his ears, tears forming in his eyes. But then on the edge of his hearing there was something else there, he heard a whisper, and it seemed to come from the sea itself, as a low murmur. He listened hard and the words were there: _Wait for me, Frodo_.

S.R 1482 


Frodo was working in the garden, he'd been out there for a few hours so far that morning. He looked at the parched earth, he'd need some rain soon if the flowers were going to survive, and he tipped more water over the dry earth. Luckily the well was still very full, and nothing ever had died so far, the rain usually came just when you wanted it to.

Bilbo stuck his head out of the door, 'I say Frodo, you wouldn't run down to the market would you?'

'I'm really busy, Bilbo,' Frodo said huffily, looking around at his adopted uncle. Didn't he have enough to do?

'Well if you do...' Bilbo said slightly hesitantly.

Frodo lifted his head stretching the kinks out of his neck. He glanced away towards the dusty road, the white dunes, the bright silver waves of the sea beyond, his eyes automatically checking the horizon, as he often did. What he didn't expect to see was a sail, judging by the size and distance it was a sail of very large ship, not the small fishing boats he was used to seeing. Stunned, he stared at it for a moment, his brain not wanting to register what this could mean. As he watched, even in those few seconds, he could tell it was heading towards shore, growing larger at an alarming rate, and heading straight for the distant harbour. 'A ship, Bilbo! A ship!' he gasped then, pointing at the vessel, its progress becoming even more obvious.

'It's been a long time since we last saw one,' Bilbo observed, shading his eyes against the sun.

Frodo stood transfixed for a moment watching, then almost without warning he ran for the road.

'Frodo?' called Bilbo. 'Where are you going?'

'I have to see, look it's coming in really fast, I have to run!' He didn't wait for a reply, he didn't hear Bilbo's objections as he sprinted up the road, not taking his eyes of the incoming ship.

Bilbo was left open-mouthed in the doorway, and Frodo ran up the road running freely for the harbour, all the time checking the position of the large sailing ship. His heart hammered in his chest, there was a roar of blood in his ears: he wasn't going to make it. Gasping for air, and glad he was so fit and healthy, the urgency of the situation powered him on, and on he went, running as fast as he possibly could.


	10. 1482 A final voyage

In the year of Shire Reckoning 1476, Sam finished his seventh and last term of office as Mayor of the Shire formally at the Free Fair in mid-summer. After forty-nine years of the job, he was old at ninety-six years old and happy to retire comfortably at Bag End, watching Frodo Gardner and his young family take over management of the place. Unfortunately he didn't have long to enjoy this retirement, as Rosie's health deteriorated a few years later. His time over the following years was then taken up with healers, and nursing his ailing wife, and it didn't help that his sleep was troubled and his old body was feeling the strain after years on his knees working in gardens.

One night in S. R.1482 they were alone together and Rose grabbed his hand, 'You will be happy after I'm gone, won't you, Sam?' she croaked.

'Rosie! You're going to be okay, we just...'

'Listen to me, Samwise!' she demanded.

Sam stared at her, she never called him by his full name, 'I want you know, that when I'm gone I want you to be happy, it's not me who needs you anymore.'

'But, Rosie...'

'He needs you, and when you go to him I want you to be happy, do you understand? You've made me so happy, we've had a wonderful life, I've seen things I never thought I'd see, and we've had many wonderful children, and grandchildren. But they don't need you anymore, Sam. He does. I, I want you to give him my love.'

Sam stared at her sadly, 'Love, my place is here, with you.'

'For now, my darling.' she smiled weakly, 'for now.'

Rosie died a few months later peacefully with her children around her. It was mid-years day the same day they'd married. On the day of the funeral a black cloud came over and a tempest blew up, but Sam didn't seem to notice. He stood over the grave, his head bowed while the wind whipped up, and the rain drenched him to the skin, but still he stood there in the semi-darkness, not moving or speaking to anyone.

He didn't seem to notice much for the next few weeks, to the distress of his family. He would spend hours sitting in the garden watching Frodo and Holfast tend Bag End's garden, moving little and saying nothing. Then at the beginning of August, his behaviour changed again, and he started locking himself away in his study for hours at a time, when the family did see what he was doing, he seemed to be looking at documents, writing long letters and scribbling in the Red Book.

When he declared he was riding off to Michel Delving for business reasons, Frodo was very concerned and tried to go with him.

'No me dear,' Sam said, 'I'm perfectly capable of riding to Michel Delving and back.'

'But Dad, you can't go alone, I can come with you.'

'I have business to attend to there and you have a family to tend to here.' was all Sam would say to this.

Frodo shook his head sadly as his father rode off, and wondered what business his father could possibly have at his age.

After that Sam received letters in the post and seemed to be secretly packing a bag with strange oddments, and when challenged on these strange doings, just shrugged, saying he needed to be prepared.

In September however, it eventually came out that he was planning to leave when Frodo discovered that the purpose of Sam's “business trip” had been to formally put Bag End into his name. 'You don't need to do that Dad,' he said. 'I'll inherit on your death anyway.'

'Ah, but I'm not intending to die, me dear.'

Frodo looked round at him shocked, 'What do you mean, Dad?'

'I'm going to be like a Mad Baggins, and just disappear. I know from experience the paperwork has to be secure in that case.' Sam sat quietly in the warm kitchen of Bag End warming his toes by the fire. 

'You can't just leave us! We need you.'

'You don't really, you know, and there's someone else who needs me more.'

Frodo failed to persuade his father to say anymore than that, but that evening Sam met most of his children under the mallorn tree to announce his departure. Not all of them had been there, Tom was off adventuring in foreign parts with a younger son of Merry's called Saradoc after Merry's father, and Elanor couldn't make it all the way from Undertowers in the Tower Hills, but the rest did not take the news very well. Sam smiled in sympathy to their entreaties, but would not be swayed and kissed them all goodbye before they left for their own homes, tears in their eyes.

Another week went past and Sam said nothing about leaving and Frodo hoped that maybe his Dad had changed his mind, but on the morning of the 22nd of September, which by tradition Sam always celebrated the birthdays of Bilbo and Frodo of the Ring, he sat Frodo Gardner down in Bag End's kitchen to inform him he was leaving that day.

They sat opposite each other, as Frodo took in this news, and Sam contemplated the realities of travelling all the way to the Grey Havens. He wasn't too bad for a hundred and two years old, but he had plenty of aches and pains, and the prospect of riding on a pony for a long distance was a little daunting.

'It's not been long since Mam died, Dad. Maybe you don't need to go?' Frodo said trying to find some new argument to persuade his Dad to stay.

'I'm sorry Frodo-lad,' Sam said taking his hand, 'It has become very clear to me in recent years that I'll get no rest whilst I stay. I hear the sea calling me, I hear your namesake Frodo Baggins calling me, and my heart yearns to go.' Sam didn't mention the nightmares, not wanting to burden his son with that.

'But is it not just grief, Dad? You miss Mam don't you?'

'Of course I do.' Sam murmured wistfully.

'You have all your children and grandchildren to enjoy, Dad. You could have a content life with us,' Frodo shed a tear.

'I said I would wait,' Sam said quietly, 'I have been waiting a long time: sixty-one years, but it wasn't just me waiting, me dear. He's been waiting too, and now he needs me.'

'You can't possibly know he's, still, well...'

'I would know,' Sam said quietly. 'We've never been truly parted.' He picked up the Star of the Dúnedain, 'This is yours now. Come now it's time to celebrate.'

They entered the parlour and Frodo moved across to sit next to his wife Poppy, and Sam edged slowly into a chair by the fire. 'As always, my dears we celebrate the 22nd of September, which as you all know is Bilbo and Frodo's birthday! Pass out the food my dear,' he said to Poppy. Then he looked across at Merry and Pippin who had joined them there at Sam's request, and they both had tears in their eyes. The two friends were old now, Merry was a hundred and Pippin was ninety-two. They were still hale for their respective ages, but white-haired and wrinkled. They were still the tallest hobbits in the Shire, despite the bending of old age, and their eyes were as bright as ever. They knew the reason Sam had asked them to visit, and their sad expressions said a lot, but yet they felt happy too for their friend was going to get his heart's desire at last.

Later, as the sun was passing the noon, Sam put on his elven cloak, hugged Frodo, Poppy and his grandchildren goodbye, and left them in Bag End stepping outside. Merry helped him put his bags on the pony. The cool early autumn breeze ruffled their hair, as the bags were tied on to the pony's sides, with thick straps. Leaves rustled underfoot as the pony whinnied and tossed its head. Sam found himself breathing easier, somehow all his worries seemed to be blowing away like the leaves drifting down the Hill.

'I almost feel jealous of you, Sam,' Pippin sighed. Then he pulled a letter out of his pocket and gave it to his friend, it was addressed to Frodo Baggins.

'Here's one from me too,' Merry said handing over another thick envelope. 'Give him our love, Sam.' He smiled sadly, knowing he'd not be seeing his cousin himself.

'I will, Merry.' Sam reached out and hugged each of them in turn. 'What about the two of you, what are your plans?'

Pippin looked at Merry, who nodded. Pippin turned back to Sam, 'We want to live out our final years in Rohan and Gondor, Sam. We've been back there many times, but..,' he trailed off.

'It's what we want to do,' Merry finished for his cousin.

'Diamond is dying, slowly they say,' Pippin said with a slight sob, tears in his eyes. Merry placed his arm around his old-friend's shoulders in sympathy.

'I'm so sorry, Pippin,' Sam said placing a comforting hand on Pippin's shoulder. Merry had already lost Estella a few years before, and his eyes filled too with the memory. All three of them were united in that moment: feeling the grief of the passing of their wives.

'Well when Diamond's gone, we're planning to leave everything to Faramir and Gorbadoc,' Merry sighed and looked up gazing off down the Hill. 'We don't intend to return to the Shire.'

Sam looked at his old friends, 'Well,' he said, 'That's the end of the Travellers, then.' Merry and Pippin nodded silently.

They all had one final hug, and they all shed more tears. Sam mounted his pony, waved goodbye, and with the roar of waves in his ears left Hobbiton for the last time, without a backward glance.

Several days later, he finally arrived at Elanor's house on the Tower Hills. It was a windswept place, but the hobbit community had all had time to settle in now, and the smials didn't look so new as they once did. Fastred Fairbairn drew his father-in-law in, and the children were all delighted to see their granddaddy, and demanded a story. Even Elfstan at twenty-eight years old, was breathless with excitement. Sam told them all the story of Bilbo's encounter with the trolls, and their mother sent them all to bed, as she wanted quiet words with her father.

Sam and Elanor sat outside as Sam had a pipe, and gazed at the rolling hills contentedly. Now that he'd decided to go, he felt like a great weight had been lifted off his shoulders.

'So you're finally going to find your treasure,' Elanor said. 

'It's my time,' he said gently holding her hand.

'I once wanted to come with you,' she said bowing her pretty head. 'But it's not that simple, is it?'

'No,' Sam let out a puff of smoke. 'You can come to the Havens though.'

'Oh Dad!' Elanor said, the tears starting.

Sam picked up the Red Book, filled with his own scribbles after the words of Bilbo and Frodo. 'I've kept it up as much as I can,' he said. 'It's yours now.' He handed the book over, and Elanor tried to not let her tears fall on the cover.

The next morning they rode out together, Elanor's fair hair blowing behind her in the wind. It didn't take long to get to the Grey Havens, and they rode down to the shoreline where an elvish ship was waiting for them. Many elves were there loading up the ship as Sam and Elanor dismounted. Then Celeborn moved forward and greeted them both with a hug. 'Well met, Master Samwise! Are you ready?'

'I'm ready my Lord,' the old hobbit said.

'It is good to see you again my fair Elanor,' Celeborn said. 'This journey will give your father much joy, so do not be down-hearted.'

Elanor cried openly, but she smiled too as she gave her father his last farewell.

'One day my love, in another life we will meet again,' he said gently.

'I love you, Dad!'

'I love you, my Elanorellë.' Sam hugged and kissed her.

He turned then and walked onto the ship and breathed a sigh of relief, somehow this was right, this was where he should be. He waved then, as she stood and watched, and like her father before her, she stood there even after the ship was out of sight.

It was several days and nights of travelling, and Sam who was not fond of boats, spent most of his time in his cabin, but eventually Celeborn called him up on deck, and Sam saw the grey rain curtain pull back. 'That's it!' he said excitedly.

'You have seen this before, little Master?' Celeborn asked.

'Once long ago in a dream, plus Frodo described the same dream, a very long time ago.'

'Of course, such dreams are known to us.' Celeborn smiled thoughtfully. He looked around then at the other elves on deck who were suddenly in a hive of activity. 'I feel I must help man this vessel: it seems to me, we are coming in much faster than expected.'

After a moment Sam could see that it was indeed so, the wind had caught the sails, and the elves were fighting to control the speed, and for a time it seemed certain the ship would be dashed on the harbour walls. Sam knew a small old hobbit who didn't like boats wouldn't be much help, so he tried to keep out of the way as much as possible, and held on tightly to the railing of the ship, which was lurching in the most alarming way. Thankfully for the worried hobbit, the elves pulled the sails round in time to tack into the little harbour which was filled with small boats and Sam could hear the high singing of elven voices, and that in itself made his heart soar.

Quickly as he could with his old creaky joints he gathered his bags together, just in time before the ship came into dock. Sam eagerly looked out over the side, but he didn't see any kind of welcoming committee waiting there.

Disappointed, he walked down the gangplank with the help of one of the elves who had lent him an arm, and he followed Celeborn and the other elves up the steps. After a few moments he found himself in the marketplace, he looked around but didn't see anyone he knew. A certain dread made his heart beat faster for a moment. Surely they were expected?

Then a group of elves strode towards them, and Sam recognised Elrond and Galadriel who were with a striking female elf he didn't know. They were talking fast in Sindarin, but Sam caught enough of the words to realise their rapid arrival had caused everyone to be late in greeting them. Celeborn was lost in his family reunion, hugging Galadriel his wife. Then Sam was introduced to Celebrían, and then Galadriel and Elrond formally welcomed him.

'It is wonderful to see you Ring-bearer,' Galadriel said kneeling down to Sam's height, 'You are very welcome here.'

'Thank you my Lady,' Sam said with heartfelt gratitude and tears in his eyes.

'It is an honour to see you again,' Elrond agreed with a smile. The elves were then lost in their reunion once more, and Sam suddenly felt quite alone. A small old little hobbit, completely out of place in this elvish paradise in which he had no business being. He was acutely aware of the hammering of his heart, whilst tears started to fall in earnest blurring his vision. He was just wondering what to do, when he heard a voice shouting his name.

'Sam! Sam! You've come!'

Sam looked around just in time to see a youthful-looking Frodo barrelling through the market stalls, and flying straight at him. He hardly had enough time to brace himself before Frodo crashed into his arms, holding him tightly, and kissing his cheeks and his forehead.

'Master!' gasped Sam in relief falling into his old habit of address, grasping desperately to the overjoyed hobbit holding him.

'Oh Sam! I wasn't here in time!'

'You were, you were, oh me dear!' and Sam's tears poured once more.

Frodo starting crying too, 'Oh Sam-dear! You came my darling, I waited for you!'

They hugged again, neither one wanting to let go, crying on each other's shoulders.

'Well-met, Samwise Gamgee,' said a voice and both of them looked up.

Sam wiped his eyes, 'Mr Gandalf! My it is good to see you.'

'And you my dear hobbit. I'm sorry I was late to greet you, it seems you took us all by surprise.'

Sam then blinked through his tears, for the first time was able to look closely at the hobbit before him. He noticed the lack of the white gem around his neck, and hoped that was because Frodo was truly healed. In fact he had to admit he was astounded at how vital and full of life Frodo seemed to be.

Frodo put his arm around Sam's shoulders, 'I can't wait to tell Bilbo about this, it will be such a surprise for him!'

'Bilbo!' gasped the old hobbit walking stiffly through the market place, 'He must be so old!'

'Valinor seems to ease age somewhat, I don't know how it works, I always meant to ask Gandalf, but never did.' Frodo looked at the back of the wizard ahead of them, 'I might have assumed I wouldn't get an answer though, he can be close at times.' he laughed.

'This place is amazing Mr. Frodo,' Sam said looking around, 'It's like the air is sweeter somehow.'

'It really is. Here let me help you, you won't have to walk far you'll see.' Frodo determinedly took hold of Sam's elbow to guide his slow progress through the stalls and busy elves, who were liable to not see an old hobbit in their rush.

Sam suddenly felt quite self-conscious about how old he was and how he must look to Frodo. He looked at his former master, but only detected joy at their reunion, and was somewhat gratified by this.


	11. Coming home

Frodo quickly declined the offer of a big celebration to welcome Sam. 'No,' he said firmly, 'I'm taking him home to recover first, the celebration can wait.'

Elrond and Celebrían seemed happy to grant this wish. Celeborn was soon giving them all the news of Arwen, Elladan, and Elrohir he had, and they moved away to head back to Elrond and Celebrían's house to discuss all the latest news of their children who were still in Middle Earth.

Frodo ran off to find someone to drive them home, and Sam sat on a low wall by the side of the road. Gandalf came and sat next to him while they waited. 'He's so well!' Sam exclaimed.

'So he is, Samwise,' Gandalf agreed nodding. He looked at the old hobbit, 'You will be too, soon. Don't worry.'

Sam sighed, 'I really wanted to come here, but now I'm here I feel out of place somehow.'

'That will pass,' the old white-haired wizard said, 'You'll feel much more at home when you get there. Things always seem strange when they are new to you. Frodo understands exactly how you feel you know, that's why he wants to get you to a place you will feel comfortable, before you become overwhelmed.'

'He went through the same thing when he arrived?' Sam looked up at the wizard, his long white beard and hair seeming just the same as he remembered.

'To a certain extent. Of course he was a bit distracted by his illness at the time.'

'But he's all right, now Mr Gandalf, sir?' Sam asked in alarm.

'Yes,' Gandalf said soothingly, 'He's all healed now.'

Sam didn't get to ask any questions about that, as Frodo cam running back just then, sitting on the other side of Sam and putting his arm around Sam's shoulders. 'The carriage is coming and we'll be off home, okay?'

The carriage arrived soon afterwards, and Sam hadn't even gathered his wits enough to ask where this new “home” was. It was an open carriage, and an elf was at the front driving it. It pulled up alongside the three of them for to climb aboard.

Frodo then hugged Gandalf, 'I'll be along in a few days to see you both,' Gandalf said. Then to Sam's surprise Gandalf hugged Sam as well, before helping him up into the waiting carriage and then handing up Sam's luggage.

Frodo said goodbye and climbed up next to Sam and before he knew it they were off, and Frodo was there next to him, holding his hand and smiling at him.

Sam gazed into Frodo's eyes, he couldn't quite believe how vital and animated Frodo was, and how very real. He almost felt like he needed someone to pinch him to prove this was truly real.

Frodo could see all of this turmoil in Sam's eyes, and happily slipped an arm around Sam's waist to pull him close, 'You rest here my lad, we'll be there soon.'

Sam with a sigh rested his head on Frodo's shoulder, and Frodo turned his head to kiss his temple. Sam closed his eyes and drifted into sleep.

It didn't seem very long before Sam was being woken again by Frodo by a gentle kiss on his head again. 'We're here, my dear,' Frodo said softly.

Sam sleepily raised his head and looked in surprise at who was greeting them.

'Mr. Bilbo?' Sam said.

'Hello Sam my lad!' Bilbo said helping him climb down from the carriage. 'You made it at last then?' he said with a wink.

The carriage turned around and left, and Bilbo took the arm of the aged hobbit and helped him indoors whilst Frodo carried Sam's bags in.

'What a wonderful garden!' Sam exclaimed looking around the sunny garden full of flowers and vegetables.

'Thank you, Sam!' grinned Frodo. Putting down the bags.

'You grew it?' Sam asked in wonder as he was helped to a settle by Bilbo.

'Yes I did,' Frodo said sitting down next to him and putting his arm around him again. 'I built this smial too.'

'You built all this?' Sam asked in wonder.

'Yes, I had a little help, but yes I built it. Do you like it?' The last was uttered anxiously.

'Yes, indeed, it's amazing!' He was rewarded with a grateful smile from Frodo.

'I didn't help at all!' laughed Bilbo, as he set off to the kitchen to prepare tea for them.

'I can't believe I'm really here.' confessed Sam once they were alone.

'I'm not quite sure I believe it either. Oh, but Sam, I'm so happy you are!' Sam was pulled into a tight hug again.

'Dear Frodo, me dear!' gasped Sam crying again.

They sat there drinking their steaming tea and eating cakes, whilst Frodo described the business of making their home in great detail, it all made Sam's head spin to know what Frodo had been up to whilst they were apart. Eventually though they finished, and Bilbo went to wash the cups and plates. 'Dearest Sam! I'd better show you around.' said Frodo excitedly, his hand stroking Sam's shoulder as he helped his old friend rise.

Sam was shown the guest bedroom, and the bathroom, Frodo was careful to explain to him how to use it, and Sam was dumbfounded by such a luxury. 'If only Merry and Pippin, could see this!' he exclaimed looking in wonder at the system. He then proceeded to find out all the details about how it actually worked, to Frodo's delight.

They ate together that evening sitting around the ornate dining table before the open fire. Sam was quick to thank Mr Bilbo for doing the cooking, but both of the other hobbits objected to this title.

'We're all going to be living together, Sam,' Bilbo said, 'Best drop the formalities.' 

Sam blushed, 'It's such a habit though.'

'But you don't do it when talking about Merry and Pippin.' pointed out Frodo, 'So you can do it with us.'

'I will try. Which reminds me, Frodo. I have letters for you.' He rummaged in a pack, 'Here we are. One from Merry, one from Pippin, and this large one from Strider'

He handed Frodo the letters, and Frodo's eyes widened in shock, and clutched the letters to his chest, tears forming in his eyes.

The one from Aragorn turned out to have two smaller letters from Legolas and Gimli. Frodo read the large one from Aragorn and he'd detailed pretty much everything he had achieved as King in the last sixty-one years.

'Has it really been that long, Sam?' asked Frodo in wonder. Putting aside the other unopened letters.

'You don't know?' Sam asked with surprise.

'Time seems to run differently here, Sam. To me it feels more like twenty years have passed.'

'And yet you seem younger than when you left, if you don't mind me saying so.'

Frodo laughed, 'Well yes, I mean look at Bilbo! Don't worry Sam, you will soon feel invigorated by this place too.'

Sam was beginning to nod heavily by this time, so Frodo took his arm, and helped him to bed, insisting on helping him undress, and tucking the covers over him.

'You don't have to,' Sam said, a little distressed. 

'After all the years of you looking after me, it's now my turn to look after you, my dear.' Frodo smiled then leaned over and kissed his temple. 'Sleep well my dear.'

He turned to go, and Sam said, 'Frodo!' He felt alarmed, but he wasn't sure quite why he was.

Frodo seemed to understand though, he turned back and caught Sam's outstretched hand and kissed it. He held it for a moment, before saying, 'Don't worry, I'll be here when you wake.'

'Promise?' Sam's eyelids were heavy now.

'Promise.' Frodo said, his lips lightly touching the back of Sam's hand again, as Sam drifted into a deep sleep.

Sam woke up the next morning, and almost didn't know where he was at first, when he looked around the small room. It had a mirror on the wall and small window, but the bed was sized for a man, and was altogether too large for one little hobbit.

There was a knock on the door, and Frodo walked in carrying a tray with tea and scones on it. 'How are you this morning, my dear?' he asked, glancing over at Sam as he carefully placed the tray down by the bed.

Sam sat up sleepy and a little shocked, 'You didn't have to...'

Frodo waved away his objection with a wave of his hand, 'I said it's my turn to look after you, and I meant it.' He smiled at his friend, 'I'm so glad you're here, I feel positively giddy!' He grasped Sam's hand briefly, 'I go run you a bath, but no rush!' Then he got up and left the room.

Sam sat stunned for a moment wondering how this role-reversal had happened. All those years of him waking his master with a tray, and running him a bath, and now Frodo was doing it for him!Then his stomach growled and he poured himself a cup of tea, and had a scone. With difficulty he swung his legs over the side of the bed, cursing his stiff joints and aching muscles. He walked out of his room still in his nightshirt, and went into the bathroom. The large sunken bath was hot and glorious on his old body, he almost felt the pain completely subside, as he floated there in perfect heaven.

When he eventually managed to dress and enter the dining area by the kitchen, Frodo was nowhere around, but Bilbo immediately sat him down and started to make bacon and eggs for him, also waving away any objection that Sam should fend for himself.

He was working his way through the pile of food, when Frodo swept in through the front door, and sat next to him hugging him in a bear hug. 'How you feeling this morning, Sam? You up to sitting in the garden for a bit? I think it will do you the world of good.'

'That sounds good to be sure,' Sam smiled shyly. He glanced at the unopened letters on the table, are you going to open those, Frodo?'

Bilbo looked sharply at Frodo then, and Frodo's happy mood seemed to dissolve suddenly.

Sam was immediately remorseful, 'I mean, you do want to that is?'

'I do want to, Sam. It's just, news from friends after all this time, it's a bit daunting that's all.'

'Of course, take your time then.' Sam pulled himself creakingly to his feet, 'I have something else with me you might like.' He left for his room and finding what he was looking for in his pack, he walked back in with several pouches of pipeweed.

'Sam! You marvel!' cried Frodo in joy.

'Wonderful!' agreed Bilbo slapping Sam on the back.

'I've brought seeds too, so we can grow our own if we want...'

Bilbo and Frodo exchanged looks, 'Oh Sam! You think of everything!' laughed Frodo. 'Of course we will grow some!'

'I'll put the kettle on,' said Bilbo. 'This deserves a celebration!'

Sam and Frodo laughed.

Later Sam sat on the bench outside in the sunny garden, smoking his pipe. He sat and watched Frodo as he tended the garden, quickly quite astonished about how much his former master knew about the craft. The pipeweed wasn't used to the hot conditions of the Undying Lands, so Frodo picked a shady patch under large sprawling trees at the edge of the garden, and watered them thoroughly. When he'd finished he was about to suggest lunch to Sam, only to find his friend had fallen asleep on the bench.

Frodo gently woke Sam, it was best for him to be indoors in the hottest part of the day after all, and after lunch, helped him back to bed for a nap.

'I'm just so tired all the time.' yawned Sam.

'I know, Bilbo was the same. Sleep, Sam, it will make you feel a lot better.' He looked critically at the stiff way his friend was moving, 'Are you in a lot of pain?'

'It's not as bad as it was,' Sam tried to reassure him.

Frodo put a cool hand on Sam's stiff shoulders and rubbed for a moment or two.

'That's better,' Sam said his eyes closing. 'Thank you.'

'You'll feel better soon, my love,' whispered Frodo.

Sam was so sleepy he didn't even question the endearment, and drifted off to sleep.

Sam woke in time for dinner, and found that Frodo had been working outside most of the afternoon. Bilbo as usual seemed to be doing all the cooking. Frodo washed the dishes, and the two older hobbits would not let Sam help, saying he wasn't up to it yet.

Frodo grabbed a couple of towels then, 'I'm going swimming,' he said. He looked at Sam, 'Do you want to come with me?'

'Me? Swimming?'

'You can just watch if you like...' Frodo said wistfully.

Sam could see Frodo really wanted his company. 'All right then,' he smiled. 'But I'm a bit old to learn new things now.'

He was rewarded by a huge smile of Frodo's face, and then Frodo took his hand and led him out into the evening, climbing over the white sand dunes and down to the water's edge. The sea was surging and crashing in waves against the beach, white foam flecks spitting along the edge. It looked to Sam almost as if it was breathing.

Frodo stripped unselfconsciously and unhesitatingly dove into the waves with a huge amount of glee. Sam sat on one of the towels on the sand and watched him swim strongly through the ripples and dive under the water over and over.

Eventually, as the sun dipped towards the horizon, Frodo came splashing out of the sea, water running down and off his naked body. He threw himself down on the towel spread out next to Sam and lay there with his eyes closed.

Sam gazed at him, he couldn't help it. He'd seen Frodo naked before of course, on many occasions as his personal manservant and on the quest, and of course Frodo had seen Sam naked too, although Sam suspected that he could never look that good. Frodo's body was tanned, and muscular, still lean, but vibrant with life. Sam didn't think he'd ever seen him looking so well. He was also stunned to see only a red mark where the morgul blade had pierced his shoulder. The whip mark around the torso was clearly visible still, and the right hand with the missing third finger was laid delicately on Frodo's stomach.

Frodo suspected that Sam was looking at him, and kept his eyes closed for a few moments longer to extend this intimate state of affairs, but eventually he opened his eyes and gazed back at his companion. 'Will you not come in the sea, Sam? It's very refreshing after a long hot day.'

Sam looked back at the sighing sea, and the fear was clear on his face.

Frodo sat up on his elbows, 'You could sit in the shallows, I won't let anything happen to you.'

'I don't know...'

Frodo sensed a victory lurking when there wasn't a flat _no,_ 'Please Sam, trust me?'

Sam sighed, 'All right, Frodo,' he said.

Frodo grinned in happiness and immediately helped Sam remove his clothes. Then he took his hand and led him into the surf.

Sam immediately saw that the water was indeed refreshing about his hot furry feet, and allowed Frodo, still holding his hand to take him deeper into the water. They stopped at waist height and stood there facing each other holding hands, as waves surged in past them. In fear Sam saw a larger wave coming towards them. 'What do we do?' he asked with clear concern.

'Don't worry, Sam. We just jump as it comes past like this!' They jumped together, 'But just don't get any seawater in your mouth, it tastes disgusting.'

They stood there for sometime as the sky darkened around them, until Frodo decided that Sam was feeling more confident. 'Do you want to try laying back in the water? You'll be perfectly safe, I won't let go. It's a wonderful feeling.'

Sam trying to put his misgivings aside laid back in the water, Frodo instructed him to look straight up at the sky, and Frodo's hands were constantly underneath his back and head gently supporting him, and eventually Sam relaxed. 'That's amazing!' he gasped as they staggered out of the water a few moments later.

'I told you, didn't I?' laughed Frodo as they both collapsed onto their towels on the beach. He sighed, 'It's so beautiful here, Sam.' He looked over at his love, and Sam was smiling. 'Well I guess we should head back, Bilbo will be wondering where we are.'

The next morning, Sam looked at himself in the mirror in his room, and felt surprised, already the face staring back at him seemed to have lost some age. The wrinkles were less obvious the skin looked more elastic, and eventhough his hair was still grey, there seemed to be an ageless quality beginning under the surface of the skin, similar to that he could see in Frodo and Bilbo.

He then thought about the past day with Frodo, it hadn't missed his notice that Frodo seemed to be touching him at every opportunity, whether it was a hug or just a brush of the hand. He found himself remembering Mordor, and the comfort a touch had brought to Frodo. Well if his former master needed physical affection, then Sam was happy to provide it. This thought in itself suddenly made him feel much more at home here in Valinor, for a while he'd wondered if he was even needed at all, but this need of touch on Frodo's part showed that he was very much needed, it was a relief and a great reassurance to him that he was in the right place.

Gandalf arrived soon after breakfast, and immediately he took Sam off to have a long talk, they ended up sitting together in the garden. Sam described what had happened to him at Elanor's wedding. 'It really scared me for a long time, and I tried not to listen to the call of the sea for some time after that.'

'It's interesting that you should describe a light as well as the burning sensation. What did you think what was happening?'

'I guess I thought I was seeing the Ring on my finger, and that was the cause of it.'

Gandalf puffed on the pipeweed thoughtfully, 'I suspect the light and the burning sensation had different causes. I spoke to Celeborn before I came here, and he told me that he saw a glow in you when you visited Lórien, which is how he knew you could cross over the barrier to the Blessed Land. You have been blessed by the Valar, and that is the evidence of it.'

'I never realised that, he didn't tell me.'

'I'm sure he didn't want to concern you. The burning I think is to do with the damage the Ring did your soul, and the nightmares too. It affected Frodo in a similar way.'

'But I don't understand: I didn't have the Ring very long.' Sam frowned puzzled.

Gandalf looked round at him, 'It still affected you: that Ring was altogether evil. You were spared a lot of damage by not harming anyone to gain the Ring, by giving it away freely, by pitying and sparing the life of Gollum, and also, despite on some level wanting it back, you never tried to take it by force. Those are all good reasons why you have earned your healing here too.'

Sam frowned, 'But why did it get worse as I got older?'

Gandalf puffed out a ring of smoke, 'Well, the same was true of Bilbo and Gollum from them we know that the longer someone holds it, the more damage it does. In your case, despite the fact it was destroyed, your ability to overcome the damage that had been caused by it became harder to deal with, the older you got. It was different for Frodo of course, as so much damage was done to him in Mordor, he couldn't have even gotten to old age. Which is also why he has found finding healing here so much of a harder, longer road than Bilbo did. Your healing should therefore be fairly quick.'

'What if it isn't?' Sam asked looking up, his eyes troubled.

'Then I will help you to find it,' Gandalf smiled around the pipe in his mouth. 'But I don't think you will need much of my help, I'm sure you will find it without me, and if not I can poke you in the right direction.'

Gandalf smiled and went back inside leaving Sam thinking about everything he'd said.

Frodo came out and sat next to him, 'You all right?' He asked, concerned.

'Well I suppose it makes sense, but I'm not sure I understand it all that well.'

'I know what you mean, I felt a bit lost when Gandalf said there was no way I could have thrown the Ring into the fire. It was a bit of shock at first.'

Sam looked round at him and took hold of his hand.

'Well I suppose we knew it was hopeless, but maybe not quite how hopeless,' Frodo said ruefully looking away towards the sea.

'Not completely hopeless, we're here aren't we?'

Frodo looked round and smiled at him, and Sam let go of Frodo's hand to put his arm around Frodo and the older hobbit rested his head on Sam's shoulder.

'You know I increasingly heard the call of sea through my life,' Sam said. 'You heard it too, before you left?'

Frodo nodded silently.

'Well after a while, I started hearing your voice within the waves, speaking to me.'

Frodo lifted his head to look in Sam's eyes, 'What was I saying?'

'I heard you say, “I miss you, Sam”.'

'I heard something too, your voice seemed to come out of the waves, a few years ago. I heard you say “Wait for me, Frodo”. It gave me hope just at the moment I needed it.'

Sam frowned, I don't remember saying that...' Then he gasped, 'I did! I said that sixty years ago when I got home after going to the Havens!'

'I said that phrase a long time ago as well.' They looked at each other for a long moment.

'You know, my lad Frodo, he wanted me to reconsider coming here, he said I didn't even know if you'd be waiting for me, but you know, I just knew you would be. I'd have known in my heart if you weren't, if that makes sense.'

Frodo slid his arms around Sam's waist, 'Dearest Sam! I think we were always connected despite the distance between us, whether it was due to the Valar, or the Ring I don't know, but I'm glad it gave both of us such comfort.'

Sam turned his head and kissed Frodo's forehead. 'It's so good to see you looking so well,' he said softly, 'Your illness has haunted me a bit.'

Frodo smiled at him, 'Yes, I'm all healed. But now you're here, I have nothing more to wish for.'

That evening Frodo opened his letters and cried a little, hearing news from his dear friends and family.

As for Sam he was feeling stronger and healthier every hour that he was there, and went to bed with a light heart.

The next morning he woke up screaming. 

As he came round he was aware of strong arms encircling him, 'It's alright Sam, I'm here, it's okay!'

Gasping Sam forced himself to calm down, the dream had seemed so real, as they always did. 'When will they stop coming?' he gasped wildly.

Frodo sat next to him on the bed, hugging Sam so that Sam's head rested on his shoulder. 'I can't answer that, but just know they will stop. It takes work and patience, but it does end.'

Sam gripped on to Frodo tightly and cried. 'I really miss Rosie!' he said eventually, 'I do! I forgot about her passing for a moment, and, and now...'

'You feel guilty. There's no reason why you shouldn't grieve for her, Sam. Do you want to talk about it?'

Sam sighed 'She was happy to go, I know that.' Tears dripped down his face.

Later they sat together in the shady part of the garden, Sam was already sleeping much less now, and his complexion had improved. He started, slowly at first, to tell Frodo all about his life in the Shire, about his children and grandchildren, and eventually about Rosie's death. 'She went peacefully,' he said softly. 'She sent you her love.'

'She knew you would come here?'

'We didn't talk about it often, but yes she knew.'

'She wanted you to come?'

'When the time was right, yes she wanted me to.'

'It's lovely to know you had her support.'

'She was the best wife I could have asked for,' Sam said quietly.


	12. A long awaited discussion

That evening Sam and Frodo ended up sitting on the white sand listening to the crash of the waves on the shoreline in front of them. The sun slowly sank and the stars which seemed so close in Valinor came out overhead.

'Sam,' Frodo began, 'I'm so happy you're here with me.'

Sam smiled at him and took his hand. Emboldened Frodo started again, 'I know there must have been many things to keep you from coming here, even without Rosie, your children, grandchildren, the Shire itself, all your friends...' He trailed off and looked back at the sea.

'It wasn't a hard choice really.' Sam said quietly.

'It wasn't?'

Sam sighed, 'The first time I heard the sea calling me was just before Strider visited the Shire, and I heard it many times in the years following that, kind of in the background and easily ignored.' He looked down at the hand he still held. 'I had much to occupy me and a full life to live, and when I heard it, I could just say, “I can wait”.' He looked at Frodo then, 'But I knew from the moment you sailed away I would follow you one day.'

Frodo looked into his eyes for a moment, and then he looked away, almost afraid of the sincerity he saw there.

'When Shelob got you,' Sam spoke again with a sob, 'and I thought you were dead.' He swallowed against the lump in his throat, 'I didn't want to leave you at all, I begged you to not to go where I couldn't follow.'

'Sam.' Frodo breathed.

'And I failed you then, I abandoned you, I...'

Frodo squeezed his hand, 'What else could you have done?' he said, 'If you hadn't left me and the orcs came and captured both of us, what then? The shadow would have truly won, as much as it was awful for me, you came, you rescued me from that place, you gave both of us a fighting chance to complete the quest!'

'I know, but I still feel guilty.' Sam looked up again, 'But the fact is you didn't go where I couldn't follow, you did, and I never intended not to, even if it did take sixty years.

'And also, in the last few years, when I was too old to do much except sit in my chair, whilst my son took over management of the smial. I starting hearing that sound of the sea more and more often, and it got increasingly urgent. It almost made walk out of the door and head towards the Havens. It was just my Rose being there which stopped me on occasion. And then I started getting more frequent nightmares. At first they were like they'd always been, dreams about Mordor, the hunger and thirst, seeing you dead, and searching for you in the tower. But then they changed and increasingly became about the Ring. What it was like to bear the weight of it, how it felt to wear it, how it tempted me.'

He looked earnestly into Frodo's eyes then, 'The dreams took on a sinister turn, I claimed the Ring as my own, I overthrew the Dark Lord, I reaped destruction in his name...' He sat shamefully quiet for a moment, 'I killed you.' Sam sobbed a little then.

'Oh Sam!' Frodo cried tears starting in his eyes as he slipped an arm around Sam's shaking shoulders. 'I completely understand, I've had the exact same dream!'

'You have?' Sam gazed into his former master's eyes.

'Yes! And I felt so bad about it!'

Sam reached out and they wrapped their arms around each other.

They sat quietly for a moment, and then Sam said, 'So you see, there's was no way then that I couldn't make the journey. I knew the only place I could find rest was here. And, and...'

'And?'

'And I wanted to see you again so very badly.' Sam smiled wetly, 'You know Elanor once called you my treasure? She knew I'd make this journey, that I was destined to come here. The others they tried to persuade me to stay, but there was no doubt in my mind at all.'

Frodo a little overcome by this didn't reply, but laid his head on Sam's shoulder as he held him there, tears coming to his eyes.

The crashing of waves was like a distant sighing, and the sky grew darker and darker; neither of them moved.

'I missed you so much.' Frodo said then.

'I missed you too.' Sam looked down at the curls on his shoulder, 'I should thank you, you gave me so much...'

Frodo lifted his head and wiped his eyes with his hand, 'No more than you deserved.' He looked into Sam's eyes, illuminated by the rising moon, 'I did you a great disservice, I think I never really knew you before the quest, I should never have threatened to have Gandalf turn you into a toad!'

Sam blushed and looked away, 'I'm sure it was no more than I deserved,' he mumbled.

'I mean I was very fond of you,' Frodo continued as if Sam hadn't spoken, 'I think you were one of the few hobbits I could actually tell real news to, or trust with my secrets; but it was only after we set out that I realised that there was much more to you than I realised.'

'Mr. Frodo...!' Sam falling back into old habits in protest.

'Listen, Sam! I never expected for you to be out of the ordinary way, and I was so wrong, I thought you came along to see elves, but yet when we met some I saw such a serious side to you, which I'd never realised was there.' Sam didn't reply to this, and Frodo continued, 'And I found out you were spying on me, part of a conspiracy, that you knew songs about elven lords, and made up your own rhymes.'

Sam looked down at the sand, red-faced.

Frodo gently touched Sam's arm, you looked after me so well when I was ill in Rivendell, you alone reacted when the watcher in the water grabbed me.' Frodo looked away a rueful smile on his face, 'It was me you turned to for comfort when Bill the pony ran off. I never told you how much that meant to me.'

Sam reached out again and grabbed Frodo's hands in his, almost absently rubbing the place where the finger was missing on the right hand. 'I never thought of it like that.' he admitted.

'You did so much for me,' Frodo continued quietly, 'Made me take you with me, even though even the act of it risked your life, fought Gollum and Faramir to defend me...'

'I wasn't much good at that.' Sam said softly.

'You always supported me, and whatever decisions I made.' Frodo shook his head remembering how hard those decisions had been to make, 'On the stairs I only felt dread, and you made me laugh, made that place not feel quite so bad.

'You held my hand, you held me in your arms, and when I couldn't go on you were there making sure I could.' Frodo looked down at their joined hands. 'I realised then, that I loved you, Sam-dear, and that was the only thing which kept me going. And then at the end of it all I didn't tell you how injured I was, or about sailing away. I know now I should have told you, but at the time I was afraid. Afraid I wouldn't be able to leave if you begged me to stay.'

Tears rose up, and started to roll down Frodo's cheeks.

'Don't cry me-dear,' Sam breathed, 'Don't cry. I understand, I forgive you.'

Frodo lifted his heavy lashes, and Sam looking into his eyes felt like his heart was breaking. Instinct took over and Sam pulled Frodo into his arms, kissing away the tears on his cheeks, running his fingers into the hair at the back of Frodo's neck.

'Oh Sam!' Frodo pressed his hot forehead against Sam's and they hung there, as strong emotions crashed through both of them. Taking a gasp, as if it was his final one, Frodo pulled back slightly, to look in Sam's eyes. 'I love you!'

'I love you too, I always have.'

Frodo smiled sadly, 'But do you love me in the way I want you to?'

'Frodo?'

He was cut off as Frodo leaned forward and gently brushed his lips over Sam's.

Sam froze in shock. Shock that this was actually happening, but more than that, he felt warmth go right through him at the touch, soft and brief as it was, a sensation he never expected to feel, as desire suddenly flared up, and that in itself scared and thrilled him.

'I'm sorry,' Frodo said distressed, 'We should go back in.'

'It's okay,' suddenly it was very important to make this right. 'I don't mind, I know you need...'

Sam's words were cut off, as Frodo leaned in again, 'Tell me to stop Sam, tell me to stop...'

Sam couldn't have said afterwards who initiated contact this time, but the fact was they were kissing, mouths moving over each other, before opening, and tongues entangling, and Sam couldn't find any regret for giving into this sensation at all.

Their hands roved over each other's faces, touching and caressing. Sam kissed away Frodo's tears on his cheeks and then kissed his forehead, Frodo sighed in his arms and shivered slightly.

Suddenly embarrassed, Sam said, 'We should go back in...'

'Yes we should.'

They got up, dusting off sand, and walked hand in hand back indoors. Sam left Frodo by his bedroom door, and went to his own room and slowly changed into his nightshirt.

His mind was in turmoil, he got up and paced the room for a few desperate minutes, before unable to contain himself any longer, he went out leaving his door open and knocked on Frodo's door.

There was a pause, before he heard Frodo's voice saying he could enter.

Frodo was changed for bed and sitting up against the headboard in the middle of his large bed, and his eyes were slightly red-rimed. He smiled, but it didn't quite meet his eyes, and Sam could see he was terribly nervous. 'I'm sorry, Sam. I shouldn't have done that.'

'It's okay.'

'It's really not, I should make you feel like you to _have_ to...'

Sam sat down heavily on the edge of the bed, 'I understand, you know. I've always known that you need a lot of physical affection, but have felt so lonely for so long.'

Frodo faced blanched, 'You knew?' he whispered.

Sam took Frodo's left hand, 'It was hard not to see it in Mordor.'

Frodo looked away his face filled with emotion. Then he sighed at length, 'I suppose I've always been that way, I haven't really had much physical affection since my mother died, she was very affectionate.' He said softly, 'I miss her so much sometimes.'

'You know when I was in Buckland,' Sam was looking down at where his thumb was tracing circles on Frodo's hand, 'I was there for Saradoc's funeral.' He looked up into Frodo's eyes, 'I saw your parents' grave there, it was overgrown and neglected, so I took it upon myself to tidy it up and plant flowers there. Merry and me, we made sure it was looked after, and I checked up on it when I was in Crickhollow...'

'Thank you, Sam.' Frodo said gratefully. He looked down at their joined hands and sighed again. 'I was only twelve when they died, and it left a big hole in my life. Growing up in Brandy Hall was fine, no one was cruel to me, but I didn't get the kind of affection I really wanted, I used to seek it with the other tweenagers at times, I was so desperate to belong you know?'

Sam nodded.

'Then Bilbo decided to adopt me when I was twenty-one,' Frodo went on, 'I was so pleased, living quietly at Bag End suited me so much better, but Bilbo was never the physically affectionate type, he's always shown affection through presents and food.' Frodo smiled softly at the thought. 'And then I was on my own for seventeen years, and I suppose I just got used to it. That was always going to be my life.' Frodo glanced affectionately at Sam, and then there was you, and I was sleeping in your arms my head in your lap, being held by you and kissed by you in that orc tower, you holding me at night, when I was cold. How long did you go without water and food Sam? How did you ever manage to carry me up that mountain?'

'I really don't know, I nearly gave up.' Sam's throat closed at the thought of that time.

'I would have given up well before then, without you.'

Sam smiled at him then, and closed the distance between them to put his arms around Frodo.

'I would have done so much more if I could,' he said into Frodo's hair.

Frodo sighed as he relaxed into Sam's arms. 'Afterwards I just felt too sick to be able to reach out to you, or to be able feel anything.'

'I understand,' Sam said kissing Frodo's forehead. 'I know how much you need this, I'm willing to be here for you, truly.'

'You don't have to, Sam,' Frodo said dismissively.

'I want to, ' Sam said softly kissing Frodo's head again. 'When I think on these long years in a lonely bed...'

'It didn't feel so long to me.'

'I know, but even before the quest, all those years... You don't have to be alone anymore.'

Frodo lifted his head and looked seriously at Sam then, but saw no hesitation there. 'I won't make you do anything you're uncomfortable doing.'

Sam only nodded. Without discussing it they laid down in the bed side by side, arms around each other, and after a few minutes, Sam was glad to see that Frodo had fallen asleep. He gazed at the wood-planelled ceiling for a while before his own eyes closed as well.


	13. Feeling uncertain

Bilbo got up the next morning, at the usual time, and found the smial was unusually quiet, he walked down the corridor from his room, and then noticed that Sam's door was standing open. He looked in curiously, and observed that Sam's bed had not been slept in.

Bilbo hurried into the parlour and dining area, and there was no sign of Sam, he glanced out of the windows, and there was no movement anywhere that he could see. Then a shocking idea entered his head, and he walked carefully to Frodo's still-closed door. He couldn't hear anything inside, and he slowly and quietly opened the door a few inches to peer inside. He could see his adopted nephew, fast asleep in the bed, his head resting on Sam's shoulder, his right arm across Sam sleeping body, Bilbo could see the arm moving up and down to the steady rhythm of Sam's slow breathing.

Bilbo froze for a moment, before slowly and delicately closing the door as silently as possible. He stood there for a few breaths, and then glanced at the door, before turning on his heel towards the kitchen, to light the fires, and make breakfast.

Frodo lifted his head from Sam's shoulder, 'You smell something?' he muttered.

'Bacon and eggs I reckon.' Sam said sleepily.

'We'd better get up.'

'Aye', Sam sat up and stretched. He smiled at Frodo briefly before leaving the room to go and get dressed.

He ended up in the kitchen a few minutes later.

'Frodo having a bath?' Bilbo asked putting food in front of him. 

'Yes, Mr. Bilbo.' Sam yawned.

'That's good.' Bilbo sat down at the table, 'Remember you can drop the “mister” now Sam, if we're going to be living together...'

'It's a hard habit to drop.' Sam said bashfully.

'Well I would prefer it.' Bilbo said fixing Sam with a direct stare.

'As you wish.' Sam agreed. 

Bilbo smiled as he looked away from Sam to the teapot he was holding. He poured Sam a cup before sitting down at the table. 'How is Frodo? He's been through so much, it's good to see him so happy.'

Sam glanced at Bilbo with a sudden suspicion, but nothing in his expression gave away that he knew anything. All he saw was a polite enquiry.

Fortunately Sam was spared the necessity of answering, as Frodo walked into the room in the silent pause which followed these words.

'Morning Bilbo!' he said happily, giving his uncle a hug.

'Bacon and eggs, my boy?' Bilbo said pulling a plate towards Frodo as he sat next to Sam.

'Thank you! You do spoil us!' Frodo looked sleepy but joy seemed to shine out of him.

'Not at all!' Bilbo smiled. 'You know I was thinking of walking to the market today, is there anything you want particularly?' He looked enquiringly at his two companions.

'I don't think so.' Frodo yawned. 'Just get what you normally do?'

'All right! Sam?' Bilbo raised his eyebrows at the younger hobbit in enquiry.

'Er no, M. er Bilbo.' Sam said looking slightly startled to be included in this conversation. Frodo smiled at him, and put a reassuring hand on his arm, before helping himself to breakfast.

'Hey, you lads should have a walk, it's a lovely day, there's nothing urgent needing doing in the garden is there?' Bilbo said between mouthfuls, hoping the question would look quite innocent of the truth. He could be a good matchmaker, he thought.

'That's a great idea! Sam?' Frodo smiled, he seemed enthralled at the idea, and stroked Sam's shoulder briefly in an affectionate caress.

'That sounds wonderful.' Sam agreed, gazing back at his former master with a deal of warmth.

Sam insisted on doing the washing up, and Frodo insisted on packing the picnic for their walk, 'You're not our servant now!' he said vehemently, roughly stuffing bread and cheese in a pack.

Bilbo watched the two of them from a distance with a deal of affection before saying his goodbyes. He smiled to himself, and felt happy enough to sing to himself as he set out on the road, cane in hand, imagining happy times ahead.

Sam and Frodo set off for their walk and Frodo showed Sam the rolling hills behind their little hobbit house, and the woods and streams which he'd found in his rambles previously. Sam was fascinated by eveything he saw, it was so beautiful and new.

They set out their picnic lunch on the hill. Looking down Sam could see the bright silver ribbon of the glittering sea on the horizon. It was hot and butterflies flew around their heads as they ate. Sam found himself feeling sleepy just as Frodo threw himself on his back next to him.

Sam laid down too, feeling comfortably full, and gazed into the blue sky watching clouds skitter past overhead.

Frodo rolled towards him onto his side, and reached up to turn Sam's head towards him. He looked so happy his lips full and relaxed, his fingers traced the edge of Sam's jaw, and Sam was aware of a swooping sensation in his belly, and his toes curled. Without really thinking about it he rolled onto his side towards Frodo, and lay there unable to look away.

Frodo's hand slipped into Sam's hair, and stroked it, with a slight smile on his lips he pressed his face forward and kissed Sam on the lips.

The kiss was slow and measured, it went on for longer than it had the previous night, and Sam didn't feel tempted to turn away. Although at the same time, there was a pull of guilt, should he really be doing this? But how could he not, when he wanted it so very badly?

Frodo fell asleep seemingly undisturbed by misgivings, and Sam lay there awake, his emotions chasing each other around and around in his mind. He suddenly felt so torn in two.

Half an hour later, and Frodo woke and stretched, and they packed up their lunch to make their way back to find Bilbo was already working on dinner.

'There you are!' he said cheerily as they walked in. He'd been singing in the kitchen as he worked. 'I had a message from Gandalf, there's to be a celebration to welcome Sam at Elrond's house tomorrow, now that Sam is so much recovered.' His eyes flickered to Sam's face, 'So we can all walk there tomorrow morning!'

'Yes, indeed.' Frodo said, 'If that is okay with you, Sam?' He reached out and put a reassuring hand on Sam's arm.

'Yes. Of course, I'd like to see them all again.' Sam said cheerily, his vigour was so much returned he could walk that far and he felt far more able to deal with a large gathering now.

That evening Bilbo bid them a good night after sharing many tales by the warm fire together, and went to his room leaving the younger hobbits there alone. When they got up to retire to bed, Frodo paused by his door. Neither of them spoke for a minute but just looked at each other. An unspoken question seemed to hang in the air, and then Sam blushed, 'I'll get my night things?' he asked.

There was a look of relief of Frodo's face, and Sam knew he'd made the right choice. He went and grabbed his things from the other room and brought them into Frodo's room, and they shut the door behind them.

They had a brief kiss goodnight, and then settled down to sleep in Frodo's bed.

~ ~ ~

The next day all three of them set out together after breakfast, and Frodo had the joy of being able to show far more of the island to Sam, pointing out landmarks and areas of interest.  
Sam was amazed by Avalónnë when they got to the city, and Frodo's hand was always on his arm whilst his with his other arm pointed out buildings of significance.

The three hobbits were treated like guests of honour and the feasting and praising was impressive indeed. Gandalf was in attendance too, and enquired after Sam's health, Sam gave standard answers to these questions, as he wasn't really sure himself, although he was sure Gandalf wasn't fooled. But the old wizard didn't press him on the issue, supposing Sam needed more time.

Sam took the praise from the assembled elves with good grace and bowed and responded with a small speech of his own. He stood on his chair before the assembled household of Elrond Half-Elven, and clearly and concisely thanked them for the warm welcome and their hospitality, and proceeded to praise the fare, wine and good company. Which in hobbit terms was a standard speech, but the elves all clapped politely, and seemed satisfied with the new periannath who was to stay there with them. They all knew the story of course, but any doubters as to his right to be there seemed to have been quelled for now. Even more impressive to them was the fact this hobbit was prepared to give elvish greetings and thanked his hosts in Sindarin at every opportunity. Frodo delightly whispered in Sam's ear that he'd made a positive impression, and Sam blushed to the roots of his hair.

The hobbits retired to their own apartment well before the feasting was finished as it seemed to be carrying on well into the night, and seeing as there were only two bedrooms, it made good sense for Frodo and Sam to share Frodo's room as they had for the past two nights. They were too tired and full for kissing though, and fell asleep straight away.

The next morning Sam opened the doors into the garden courtyard area by their apartment and sat in the sunshine on a stone bench swinging his legs staring at all the unfamiliar plants and flowers which grew there.

An elf he didn't know came out to tend the garden, and they fell into a long conversation about the plants and the process of gardening here on Tol Eressëa. Eventually the elf sat down beside the hobbit.

'Your deeds are so well known here it is such an honour to welcome you.' he said smiling.

Sam blushed, 'Thank you very much!'

'Our hearts are all gladdened to see you so happy, with your lover at last, there are many making songs about it.' The elf smiled broadly, before taking his leave.

Sam stared blankly at the garden, but didn't seem to see anything.

Lunchtime arrived and the other hobbits hadn't seen Sam at all that day. 'Frodo!' called Bilbo, 'Call Sam in would you? It's time to eat!'

Frodo stepped outside, 'Sam! Sam! Sam?' But there was no sign of Sam anywhere.

Sam lost track of the time as he walked aimlessly around the gardens, he felt numb, unable to face the feelings inside.

His meandering steps eventually brought him out into a ordered paved garden with flowers on each side and pagodas loaded with honeysuckle. He paused as he suddenly realised he wasn't alone.

Lady Galadriel was sitting there calmly facing him. He bowed stiffly, 'Lady'.

'Please sit Samwise.' she said gently but firmly.

There was no disobeying that voice, and Sam sank on to the opposite bench.

'I feel I need to thank you for bringing my Celeborn home with you.' she smiled warmly.

'That was no doing of mine, Lady,' Sam said embarrassed, he looked down at the paving slabs under his feet for a moment, before looking up again.

'Well I thank you anyway.' She gazed at him in a penetrating manner, 'Your heart is ill at ease, whatever is the matter?'

Sam sighed and looked at his hands. It was hard to bear the Lady's gaze for too long. 'Nothing.'

'Clearly not my dear. Tell me.' her tone was gentle and probing, but without judgment.

Sam looked up and realised he had to tell her everything, there was no way he couldn't. 'An elf I met..,' he trailed off.

'Yes?' those eyes bore into his with a quiet determination.

'Well,' Sam blushed, 'he assumed that Frodo and I..., that we are..,' he couldn't talk around the lump in his throat.

'Lovers?' she completed still gazing at him directly.

Sam looked at her sharply, 'How do you...?'

'You forget, Perhael,' she said a smile dawning on her beautiful face, 'I have seen in your heart.' She looked at him closely but with affection, 'and in the heart of your Iorhael.'

Sam gasped in shock and looked away once more, tears unbidden formed in his eyes, and he tried to blink them away rapidly.

'What troubles you?' she asked again in that soft voice of hers.

'I, I... I never expected to feel these things, I never thought I was like that..' Sam struggled, the concept was too huge, how could he ever understand these feelings?

'Hm,' she said, 'Neither did Frodo at first, he found it all quite hard to come to terms with.'

'He did?' Sam said in surprise.

'Indeed,' she smiled, and there was sympathy in her eyes. 'Why do you hold yourself back from these feelings?' she asked.

Sam sighed heavily, 'I suppose I feel like if I give into these feelings, I will betray my Rosie.'

'Would she object, to you finding happiness without her?' Galadriel said leaning forward slightly as she pressed home her point.

Sam shook his head with tears in his eyes, 'No, in fact I think she was trying to give me her blessing.'

'So what is holding you back? Have you taken any control in what happens between you, have you ever initated a loving touch between you?' she seemed to know exactly what was in his heart and mind, and Sam knew he'd never even thought about it that way before.

'I suppose I haven't.' he agreed at last.

'Why is that?' there was no judgment, just a simple question.

'I'm afraid.'

'What frightens you?' she asked simply and directly.

'That, that somehow I will lose myself, or be someone else.' He shook his head, 'I don't know.'

'It is understandable to find a new relationship frightening,' she tilted her head thoughtfully. 'You need to do this for the right reasons, Perhael. Not because your Frodo needs you, not because your Rosie wanted you happy, you need to do what makes _you_ happy, and take possession of it. No half measures as that is not fair to either of you. What do _you_ want, Samwise?'

Sam blew out a slow breath. In his mind's eye he saw Frodo sleeping next to him on the pillow, he felt the surge in his loins when they kissed, he felt the fierce love that had always been there albeit never declared. And now, now Frodo wanted him. Wanted whatever Sam could give him whether that was tentative kisses or passionate loving.

'I think you should go home,' the Lady said rising from her seat, the interview was over.

Sam stood and bowed, and headed back towards his apartment.

Frodo in a ball of misery, lay on the sofa by the fire. Bilbo was fast asleep in a chair nearby. Sam hadn't come back for lunch or even for dinner, and as it got dark, Frodo felt a shadow creeping into his soul. It was all his fault. He should never have declared himself, should never have pushed that little bit, to feel Sam's lips on his own was heaven, and oh how much else he desired! The strength of that desire completely took his breath away, but it was not surprising that Sam didn't want that. Didn't want him in that way. After all Sam had wanted Rose Cotton. He wasn't likely to switch to wanting lads now, even someone Sam loved. It had been a crazy hope, and now Frodo's heart was ready to break. Bilbo had tried to reassure him, “Surely he wouldn't have bedded down with you if he didn't want to?” But Bilbo didn't understand. He didn't know how Sam had to always do what Frodo wanted; loyal to a fault.

Suddenly Frodo heard the click of the backdoor, and then Sam was on the threshold, his eyes taking in the scene. Seeing the pain in Frodo's eyes.

'I'll er, I'll make supper..,' he said awkwardly.

Frodo didn't respond, and Bilbo didn't stir.

Sam left and went into the kitchen. He stood there unmoving taking deep breaths, then he straightened his back and walked determinedly back into the parlour again. Frodo hadn't moved, and Sam sank to his knees in front of him.

'I'm sorry,' he gasped, 'I'm sorry I was away so long, I needed to think, to decide.'

Frodo looked at the fire and didn't move. Sam reached up and grabbed his hands. 'I was scared, scared of these feelings, of what was happening, it was all too much.'

Frodo didn't look at him, 'It's alright Sam, don't worry about it,' he said shortly.

'No it's not okay!' Sam said fiercely, 'I hurt you and I shouldn't have...'

Frodo sighed, 'I want you to be happy here, Sam. I don't want you to give part of yourself you can't give.'

'Listen to me please, me-dear! I do want that, I want it so bad it scared me rigid.' Sam clutched at Frodo's hands. 'I never expected this, I didn't.'

Frodo looked at him then, and smiled affectionately, 'Neither did I,' he whispered.

With a grateful sigh Sam pulled Frodo down into his lap and held him there, his arms winding around his love, and Frodo clutched his shirt with straining fingers.

'Are you sure this is what you want?' Frodo breathed.

'Why don't we go to _our_ room and find out?' Sam said forcefully.

Frodo smiled at that, 'Yes,' he said softly. ' _Our_ room.'

Sam gazed at the hobbit in his arms, and taking in a sigh of relief, he bent his head to kiss him. Frodo uncurled himself and wrapped his arms around Sam's neck. They broke apart, ' _You_ kissed _me_!' he murmured in wonder, his fingers curling into the hair at the nape of Sam's neck.

'Aye. And I'm going to do it again.' Sam said firmly.


	14. Lovers together

They staggered together into their room, and stood there for a moment, breathing hard. Frodo was the first one to move, and they fell on the bed holding hands, and lay there looking at each other.  
Frodo reached out and traced his fingertips across Sam's face, and Sam closed his eyes in a sudden ecstasy.

They touched each other's face with fingers and light kisses, fingers entangling in locks of hair, before their mouths gently touched, brushing together with feather-like movements. Sam turned his head unable to be delicate any more and sought those luscious lips, again and again they came together, before deepening the kiss, working softly and slowly together exploring with their tongues, sighing with desire.

They clutched at each other as if the other would fade into thin air if they did not, arms wound around torso, and Frodo rolled on top of Sam in an effort to get even closer. They didn't break their kiss, not even when Frodo's warm hands traced patterns under Sam's shirt.

Sam gasped and kissed Frodo's collarbone, his fingers working loose the buttons there. Rapidly they pulled away their shirts, and their bare chests pressed together as they resumed their kissing. Frodo's hands wandered southwards, his fingers finding Sam's nipples, stroking his chest.

They spent a long time in this state of touching, kissing, and resting. Over and over until in the middle of the night they fell asleep in each other's arms, exhausted by the emotions of the day.

The next morning they woke late, and they went to the bathroom hand in hand, and the bath was quickly filled with hot water. Sam sank into the water with a sigh, and Frodo slipped in between his legs, his head leaning back resting on Sam's shoulder behind him.

Sam grabbed the soap and slowly started to wash the hobbit sitting in front of him, lathering him down the chest, and then the inner thighs. His lips found Frodo's pulse point on his neck and he whispered endearments into Frodo's skin as his hands worked. Frodo opened his legs wider as Sam's hands stroked down between them, causing him to groan loudly. There was no disguising the arousal between his legs, and Sam knew that Frodo must be able to feel Sam's own against his back.

After many minutes of steady washing, Frodo moaned, 'Please, Sam! Touch me!' The pent up arousal from the past few days was just too much at this point.

Embolded and horny as hell himself, Sam's strong fingers wound themselves around Frodo's arousal, and started gently pulling up and down, slippery still with soap. Frodo gasped and pleaded, but Sam kept a steady action, until he saw how much Frodo's body was arching against him, his fingers tightly gripping the edge of the bath on either side. Sam increased the pace, and almost immediately Frodo shuddered and came, groaning and gasping as his seed spilled into the water.

Sam thought he'd rarely seen a lovelier sight. It took some moments for Frodo's heartbeat to return to a reasonable pace, and he turned around and straddled Sam's lap. He gazed into his former servant's eyes, they were dark and heavy with want, and Frodo thought he'd never seen anything he wanted more than this.

'May I?' he asked. His hand reaching down into the water, stroking gently against the stiff erection he found there. Seeing agreement in Sam's wordless nod, he used his maimed right hand to good effect, deftly stroking and teasing, until Sam could not be silent anymore.

'Please, Frodo! Please! Just..,' his plea became a groan as Frodo expertly worked him in a frenzy of actions, before shuddering and bucking into Frodo's hand, he came. He collapsed dazed against the side of the bath. He hadn't expected it to be so very intense.

Frodo put his arms around him. 'How long has it been, Sam?' he asked softly.

Sam tried to think back, he'd been too old for such things, Rosie had been ill so long... 'Years and years,' he gasped.

Frodo hugged him lovingly and they lay there chest to chest, not speaking for some time whilst Sam got his breath back.

After breakfast, Sam and Frodo were approached by Bilbo. 'I've decided to say here for a week or so,' he said. 'I want to visit friends and I'm writing more poetry. You two can head home if you want.'

Frodo exchanged a look with Sam, 'Thanks Bilbo,' he said hugging him, 'I think we will walk back this afternoon.' The old hobbit chuckled, and watched them leave affectionately.

They took their time walking back, but arrived well before dinnertime, they walked and talked on the way rather idly about the time they had spent apart: Sam told expansive stories about Merry and Pippin, and Frodo told Sam about his building project.

They made dinner together, Frodo making sure that Sam wasn't going slip back into old servile habits. After dinner, they sat in front of the fireplace kissing and gently touching each other. Their fingers and lips exploring and learning each other. Neither of them were in any rush in the new side of their relationship, it was new and exciting, and both of them were aware of how scary it was to be doing something so intimate.

They tumbled into bed a few hours later, madly touching: unable to keep their hands off each other. Frodo roughly pushed Sam onto his back on the covers, climbing over him, his lips kissing his neck, whilst Sam's hands stroked over Frodo's back. Frodo worked his way down Sam's body kissing every inch of skin he could, ignoring any pleas and moans coming from his lover. Then he worked his way back up capturing Sam's mouth with his. His tongue slipped inside, slowly at first, until it seemed that neither could take any more. Frodo's hips starting to slide up and down trapping their erections between their slick writhing bodies, he set a slow rhythm, until both of them were gasping in desperation. Sam couldn't take anymore and reached down grabbing hold of their arousals in his solid fist, and Frodo bucked faster then, and unable to take anymore they both came together spilling between their bellies.

It took some time to get their breath back, they'd both gotten so aroused for so long the aftershocks went on for some time. Frodo lay with his cheek resting against Sam's heaving chest, waiting until he could speak again. 'I really don't want to stop doing that,' he observed.

Sam reached out to hug him as Frodo lifted his head, and they kissed sweetly before Frodo rolled off, and Sam fetched a cloth to clean them both. Then they settled down in each others arms, and slept naked together their bodies wound around each other. They were incredibly comforted by being together in this new sexual way.

Sam woke late the next morning. He considered getting up and making breakfast, but he was lying under Frodo, and Frodo was holding tightly on to him. He looked at his lover and wondered, not for the first time, how he'd ended up so amazingly attracted to his former master. Did Rosie know all along? Did he?

He racked his brain, and considered the past, had he dismissed any thoughts like these he'd had before? He thought about Mordor, about how he'd held Frodo in his arms as if he could hold him forever. He'd never seriously considered it at the time. He'd known about his love for Frodo, but had it been romantic love? His mind was full of turmoil again and he couldn't think straight. It also didn't help that he was as hard as a rock.

Frodo shifted and woke up, 'Morning my love,' he said kissing Sam on the lips.

Sam was so pent up he rolled Frodo over on his back and began madly kissing down his neck and chest. Frodo groaned, and Sam was happy to observe his former master in the same aroused state as he was. 'There's something I want to try,' Sam panted.

'What? Oh my!' Frodo's hips rutted forward as Sam's mouth closed over him.

Sam held him down with one hand and licked and swirled his tongue up and over before swallowing deeply around Frodo.

'Oh! Oh! Sam! I'm going to..,' Frodo's hips bucked out of Sam's control as Frodo's seed spurted into his mouth, and his body jerked before collapsing back.

Sam moved up and kissed Frodo on the mouth. 'That was amazing,' Frodo gasped. 'Let me try it on you.' Then Frodo enthusiastically flipped Sam over on to his back.

After they ate breakfast together, Sam was washing the dishes, when Frodo came up from behind him, winding his arms around him, hands gliding up under his shirt, fingertips finding Sam's nipples. A rush of desire came over Sam and he dropped the soapy plate into the sink in front of him, as his head rolled back on to his lover's shoulder and he groaned loudly. He was suddenly amazingy erect as Frodo pulled his shirt off over his head, and both of them dropped to their knees on the floor, fingers and tongues exploring as lust completely took them over, leaving them gasping on the floor.

It was like that all that day. The rains Frodo had been waiting for finally arrived, and the rain fell in hard sheets striking the green dry land quenching its thirst. But the two hobbits in the smial hardly noticed, as pent-up repressed sexual feelings which had been dammed up for a lifetime, surged through the now-broken dam, and washed over them frequently wherever they happened to be. It happened in the kitchen, dining area, parlour, bathroom and bedroom.

That evening dinner plates lay unwashed on the table as the hobbits were to be found naked, slick with sweat on the hearth rug in front of the fire. Frodo was on top, his hardness rutting against Sam's in a now-familiar dance, he watched Sam's face as his lover bucked under him, body arching and groaning as Sam's seed spilled between them, the sight of Sam's ecstasy sent Frodo over the edge crying out and collapsing bonelessly on Sam's chest.

Sam gazed at the ceiling as he tried to get his breathing under control. 'Well,' he said, 'it's going to be hard to live our lives if we need to make love as often as this all the time.'

Frodo responded with a weak laugh from the direction of the crook of Sam's neck, before pushing himself up on his left arm to gaze into Sam's flushed face. He reached out with his maimed right hand, pushing the sweat-drenched curls back from Sam's forehead. His fingertips tracing the scar Sam had earned in Moria. Sam had gained a youthful yet ageless appearance, and the strength of body and mind which the Blessed Land endowed to mortals living there, and Frodo thought he'd never seen seen anyone more beautiful.

Sam reached out his hand stroking Frodo's smooth face, 'You're gorgeous,' he said thickly.

'So are you.'

Sam's eyes opened wide with surprise, his brows raising, 'Me?' He'd always thought of himself as being quite plain.

'You've always been beautiful to me,' Frodo said lovingly.

They cleaned themselves and the dishes, and retired to bed. The rain still poured and lashed down against the window, but the two hobbits were snug and warm in bed, and a few hours later they fell asleep finally exhausted, nakedly lying in each other's arms.

The next day Frodo took Sam to the quiet pool he'd found in the woods, they stripped and bathed together there for some time. Afterwards they threw themselves on the soft moss by the pool, in the dappled shade of the swaying trees. Sam pushed himself onto his side, and gazed at the naked skin of his companion. He reached out a hand to the red mark on Frodo's shoulder, 'It doesn't hurt anymore does it?' he asked softly.

'Not anymore, no.' Frodo reassured him.

'What happened?' Sam asked curiously.

'Well my illness took over soon after I arrived here, I guess I was a bit crazy with it for a while, but Elrond looked after me.'

'Did he cure you?' Sam asked.

Frodo sighed, 'No Gandalf fetched one of the the Valar: Nienna, she did something to my wounds, it hurt, but then I never suffered with my annual illnesses after that.'

Sam fingers traced the wound gently, and Frodo gazed up at him as he did.

'The other wounds: the mental ones were more difficult to deal with it turns out.' Frodo continued.

'The nightmares you mentioned?'

'Yes and the Ring-craving. I never told you because I was so ashamed, but after it went into the fire, I still wanted it back, and that haunted me more than anything,' Frodo lapsed into silence.

'I do understand that you know.'

'I know,' Frodo said squeezing Sam's hand sympathetically.

'Well how did you heal from that? You did heal, didn't you?'

Frodo smiled at his lover, 'Yes I did heal, but it was a... painful process, I had to come to terms with everything, my failure on Mount Doom for one.'

Sam cupped Frodo's face with his hand, 'You didn't fail, love.'

'I know, I know that now... But I felt I did for the longest time: I felt so ashamed.'

Sam sighed, 'No one knows better than me that you could have done no more than you did.' Sam said kissing Frodo's cheek.

'I realise that now, it doesn't bother me anymore, you needn't worry.' Frodo reached out and stroked his lover's face.

Sam wasn't going to be put off however, 'What else did you have to come to terms with? It sounds like there was something else from your talk.'

Frodo pushed himself up on one elbow to look more directly at Sam, 'I had to come to terms with my feelings for you. Feelings that were so repressed, I wasn't willing to even think about them. In the end I had to let them in, to feel for you fully all I'd been repressing. It got rid of the Ring-craving for good. But after that instead of Ring-craving, I had a craving of a different sort.' Frodo's cheeks went a bit pink at this confession, and Sam's eyes widened.

'You mean?'

'Yes,' Frodo laughed ruefully, 'I had to take care of things several times a day if you catch my drift,' he blushed redder then with embarrassment. 'And I didn't even know if you wanted to come here, and if you'd want me like that if you did...'

Sam's eyes softened, 'My poor sweet master,' he said.

'Sam!' Frodo said sternly, 'Don't...'

His protest was cut off as Sam kissed him, and trailing fingers found his nipple and circled them in a most distracting way. The fingers slid all the way down Frodo's belly causing him to groan into the kiss, and Sam rolled on top of him, hardness against hardness, as Sam rutted against him. Then Sam's hand closed around Frodo's erection and there was no teasing this time, as Sam's hip and hand worked together until Frodo broke the kiss, his head falling back as he gasped loudly his seed spilling over Sam's hand and onto his belly. He lay there gasping as Sam rolled to the side, to ease his weight off him.

When Frodo could speak again he raised himself on one elbow, to look at Sam. It didn't escape his notice that Sam was sporting a very hard erection of his own.

'I'm not your master, not anymore, don't call me that.' he continued his complaint. With that he rolled Sam on to his back and licked and sucked at Sam's nipples, whilst his hand captured Sam's hardness and stroked it until Sam was gasping with want.

Then Frodo slid down Sam's body and slipped his mouth over him, until Sam couldn't take anymore and came hard, spraying into the back of Frodo's throat. Frodo left his love gasping there, as he went to the pool and washed himself, before collapsing at his side again.

They lay there not speaking for some time, the wind rustled the leaves and branches above their head, and the sunlight slanted through the trees onto their bare skin.

Eventually Sam spoke, 'You know love, there could be times when it could be fun to call you master,' he rolled himself onto his side towards Frodo, and raised an eyebrow with a cheeky grin. 

Frodo looked at him for a moment before raising himself onto one elbow again to look into Sam's eyes. 'Maybe...' he said, 'But only if the roles can be reversed and I can call _you_ master some of the time.'

Sam's jaw dropped at this suggestion and stared at Frodo with a seemingly blank expression, then it dissolved into dark and lustful, and a delighted Frodo was roughly pushed back down onto the soft springy turf.

They cooked together that evening, falling easily into that ease around each other formed over years in the Shire, except this time, their fingers would brush against each other as they passed, and kisses and endearments exchanged.

After dinner they sat together comfortably in each other's arms by the fire. 'I longed for you so much, Sam.' Frodo said with a small sigh.

'Before I left home to come here, I was convinced you needed me,' Sam said, 'I had this unbearable compulsion to come here. I mean I knew I desperately wanted to see you again, but I never allowed myself to think on how much _I_ needed you, if you understand me. I don't think I fully realised that until I arrived at the dock and I didn't see you there.'

'I'm sorry I was late, Sam.'

'That's okay me dear,' Sam said kissing him, 'And then you looked so well and happy I immediately started to fear I'd been wrong somehow and you didn't need me at all.'

Frodo opened his mouth to protest, but before he could say anything, Sam continued, 'Yes, now I know you did. The point is I needed and longed for you just as much, except I felt like I shouldn't, that it wasn't what you wanted for me.'

'I understand that all too well,' Frodo murmured squeezing Sam's hand as he did so. Sam gazed at him and felt emotions he had never expected rush over him. 

'I had a hole in my heart after you left, but now I feel at peace if you know what I mean, I no longer feel torn in two.'

'Dear Sam!' Frodo buried his face in Sam's soft curls. 'I thought about you everyday you know.' he sighed.

'I thought about you too. Everyday, everytime I looked at anything, no matter how happy I was, I wondering what you were doing, if you were happy, how you were missing seeing everything I was.'

'Well we have plenty of time to tell each other everything we've seen and done. I've already seen your visit to Gondor or part of it at least.'

'How on Middle Earth did you see that?' Sam exclaimed in surprise. Frodo grinned at him, and kissed his nose in reply.

A week after they had arrived back at the smial together, they were laying in bed next to each other after love-making, when Frodo said, 'If it's been sixty-one years, then I'm a hundred and fourteen, is that right?'

'Aye that's right, love,' Sam agreed.

'Therefore,' Frodo made a quick calculation,'I've known you for ninety-three years.'

They both considered that fact for a moment. 'That's a long time,' Sam agreed at last.

'It really is. But for most of that time we weren't, that is..,' Frodo faltered. 'I guess what I'm trying to say is: in ninety-three years, we've only made love for a week.'

'It is odd when you put it like that,' Sam agreed.

'But when you think about it, for most of that time, we weren't the hobbits we are today.'

'What do you mean, Frodo?' Sam said sitting up.

'Well,' Frodo rolled on to his stomach and considered Sam, 'If I'd stayed in the Shire, how likely do you think this would have been? They don't exactly welcome this kind of relationship, and well, we would never have been equals. You would always have been the servant and I the master, you would always have been looking after me, and I would let you. I'd have never become the strong person I am now through my own endeavours, because you would have done all that, and with me there you would never have become the gentlehobbit landowner: the strong confident Mayor of the Shire. You have changed so much in your dress, and voice, and the way you took the adulations at Elrond's house without a blush, how you stood and gave a speech with such ease: I could see how much your time in the Shire has changed you.

'You've become the scholarly master of Bag End, and I've become the gardener, and now here in this place we're equals in a way we never would have been if we hadn't been parted all these years.'

'I never thought of it like that.' Sam sighed, 'But you leaving: it was such a sacrifice, you lost so much, your health, your mind even, you lost your whole future. And it was you that guaranteed the rest of us to having the happy, safe lives we had, it's such an injustice, and it pains me.'

'I see that,' Frodo said softly slipping his naked body between Sam's legs so that Sam could wrap his arms around him. 'But now Sam, perhaps _this_ is my ultimate reward. You, me, here, now. I found the idea of being with you like this, just as hard to accept as you did, but it seems so right. And now we have all the time in the world. We have no responsibilites, no reason to hide our relationship from others, just us here for as long as we like, and at the very end we can choose to go, and we can choose to go together.'

'We can?'

'Absolutely Sam, there's no reason we need ever to be parted again. I promise you, we will go together, when we both want to. This is our second life: our chance to have the reward we deserve.'

'Oh Frodo, I love you so much. It took me a while to see the Frodo I knew in you, but now I feel like I've fallen madly in love with you all over again.'

'I love you Sam,' Frodo said. 'IloveyouIloveyouIloveyou!'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you've all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it!


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